The Dark Servant

He was born just like any man, hundreds of years before the village of Leszek was founded, when people lived in the forest rather than in fear of it. His mother was a young naïve girl, who was forced into a cruel wedlock due to her pregnancy. The man he called father was a wretched fool who committed foul acts of adultery. This stunted the girl emotionally and scarred her physically. He had not known of his bride’s pregnancy until some time after the marriage was consummated and when the baby was born it was evident that it was not from his own bloodline. The child didn’t have tanned leathery skin like him; it was pallor. Nor did it have red hair like his wife or blonde like himself and his father before him; it was black as the night. The watery blue eyes that should be looking out were big and hazelnut. He knew that he had been cuckolded but, as any man would, he refused to admit the facts and drew his rage inwards for many years. His named father drank bittersweet ales until his senses were tangled but it had never caused more than an argument and a beating for either him or his mother. When the boy had turned ten years old things got considerably worse. One night it had started as most of their arguments did, accusations with lack of vindication, but this time instead of falling to bed tired after the argument raged on into the night, he took her head and began to beat it against the wall. She screamed and tried to fight back but she was small and weak in comparison to the monster. Her eyes were blackened and her nose broke but still he wouldn’t stop until the pale wooden floor went from dusty grey to scarlet.

            The boy had witnessed this act and knew what would be in store for him the next day or even that night if he hung around. He knew he should run but he couldn’t leave his mothers corpse to be buried in a way in that she didn’t believe suitable. His mother was a follower of nature not of the superstitious ideas. He’d seen them do allsorts of things to bodies to stop her rising from the dead. They might dismember her or remove her organs. He couldn’t let them do that to her. He waited for his father to drink himself into a stupor before he moved into the room to take his mothers body. He lifted the almost childlike figure onto his back and carried her into his beloved forest. They had spent many happy times in the forest together. It was where she would want to be laid to rest. He dug a hole in the rich earth that was barely large enough for the girl to lie in but the boy was tired and traumatised by the night’s events. He gently placed his once beautiful mother in and sadly filled the shallow grave with dirt. He half wished she’d survived and it could just be them again but he half wished he’d died along with her. As an after thought he made a makeshift marker to show where his dearly devoted mother would spend eternity dreaming.

            Years rushed by and he felt himself being outcast by the superstitious society he had trusted as a child. Now a young man, a handsome one despite his oddities, he slept under the stars in the same clearing that he buried his mother in. The makeshift twig marker had disappeared now and replaced by a smooth black stone, which he’d chiselled her name in. He lived off the fruits that the forest bore seemingly only for him. He had little urge to return to the rough groupings of scattered houses but did so in order to steal scraps of paper and inks to write his crafts.

            The autumn sun was approaching in the sky when disaster struck the strewn community as their crops failed. People began to starve and others fell ill with a mysterious disease that claimed more and more lives everyday. Sick and deluded the remaining community turned the blame onto the outcast. They accused him of cursing them and exiled him to the far regions of the forests to uncharted lands that, they hoped, would banish his darkened soul in death and stop their run of bad luck. He didn’t die there though. He thrived. His years slowed and then stopped completely as he became part of the very essence of the forest itself. Nutrients soaked into his skin from the earth that he stepped on. He grew tall and strong like the trees. His ageless skin was subject to change from greens through to browns in the seasons of his emotions. He became a part of the spirit of the forest.

 

That is the original story of Ghille Dubh but as time went by the story became warped and the facts were lost. He was depicted as an evil entity or a wild spirit that couldn’t be trusted or controlled. Many just regarded him as a story to stop children wandering beyond sight but very few had ever met the man himself for he is a shy and often docile creature who fears no one but is kind to children and those innocent enough to not be corrupted by the ordeals of life. The story of his creation is not the end of his tale, it isn’t even the most important part; in fact this was only the beginning of it.

 

The birch was his only home. The whole forest adored him but none of it felt like home. He couldn’t leave his divination tools in the forest for chance that an animal may injure itself or take them. He needed somewhere of just his own where other nature beings didn’t interrupt his thoughts, where he was protected from the cold night chills that blew from the north.

His sapling green skin was smooth and fresh like that of a new flower stem breaking through the soil. His black mane was as wild as ever as it drooped over his hazelnut eyes. He constantly flicked it out of his face as he scrawled in his books about signs from the stars to numerology in an attempt to make his next move. Ghille Dubh always felt like he was meant to be doing something and so he fuelled his obsession by noting everything that happened every day, searching restlessly for the reason for this gut feeling. The books sprawled around his one roomed house. They fit on the crooked shelves he’d managed to make from fallen bark but he knew soon they would spill out onto the floor.

            He had another feeling as well as his time in the forest continued. He’d felt it for a long time, a growing evil from the mountains. The scent was brought in the wind.  He knew it would spread soon but he didn’t know how to stop it. His better judgement told him that he wanted to stop it from hurting the gatherings of people populated the forest but his bitterness told him to let them rot. The people who had exiled him died many years ago. He’d have lost count if he’d not written everything down. He knew it was just over two hundred years since he’d left their community. He worked through his hate even though he knew that the creatures, which considered themselves dominant to the rest of life, were too stubborn and foolishly fond of their abodes to move on like the animals in the woods were.

            The growing evil contaminated his daydreams and gnawed at his insides while he watched the oblivious forest dwellers carry on their everyday business while their very existence was being threatened. Ghille had attempted to warn them but they had dismissed his attempts as malicious children. He dare not reveal himself to them in case they attacked him in fear but still despite his every effort to reveal the truth to them, they still had no idea that the forest would convert from their safe haven to a place that would destroy their connection with nature for many generations.

            The feeling plagued him for month after month. The insecurity knowing that an army of darkness could attack at any moment but he didn’t know when. He’d seen the scouting demons already. Surveying and analysing the forest their half-headed stature sniffling and snorting the air through the two holes in their face that acted as noses.

            As the days passed, Ghille began to recall theories his mother had taught him. “Always plant rosemary by your gate” she used to say to him, when teaching him how to keep the forest creatures out of his garden that always seemed drawn to him. Ghille planted several in a rough circle around his birch and joined them with lines of ammonia. He hoped this would stop the scouts from finding him. Although he was sure they couldn’t hurt him, he didn’t want to put himself in unnecessary danger.

            The moon past two more cycles and on the full moon he heard an almost cryptic knock on the door as a frail hand tapped the velvet wood. He pushed himself through the concealed crevice that lead to the outside forest. Outside stood a small female figure dressed in black dirty rags. She turned to face him removed her hood and revealed her single eye to him. She was a Likho. Neutral, but not someone you would want to offend. Her quick tongue could complete a curse before you even moved. But this wasn’t just a Likho she was the crone reincarnate. She was the Seer.

 

“I have something for you” the woman creaked, “May I come inside.”

Ghille was nervous. She was by nature neutral but he had seen many neutrals sway either way. He knew he should fear this old woman but he hadn’t felt fear since he’d begun his exile. Discomfort possibly. Nervous definitely. But scared? No. He had a feeling since he moved here that he couldn’t be killed or destroyed, he had not tested it of course but here, in the presence of this hag. he felt all his confidence stripped away.

“Whatever you have you may give it to me here.” He said attempting to be dominant but his voice quivered. The old woman smiled knowingly.

“I thought you may say that but I must insist it is not safe in these woods for a…fragile lady like me,” he saw a glint in the woman’s eye.

She wasn’t fragile at all but he gave in, he knew that if she had wanted to kill him she didn’t need to be even in eyeshot. Ghille took her hand and helped her through the crevice as if she was vulnerable.

“What is this gift you speak of?” he asked briskly.

“A gift of wisdom. I have seen something that concerns me and I have seen it concerns you as well…as a neutral I don’t usually bother myself with these wars between good and evil but I received a vision. A vision of the future if we do not correct it. There will be no neutral grounds; there will be no good. There will just be evil and the petty humans, that you so long to be accepted by, will perish.”

“I have felt this too,” Ghille admitted.

“But it is not the evil that will cause the greatest damage, it is you. You will want to leave to go across the Grey Sea searching for answers that you will not fathom. But in your time of desperation you must not leave this sacred place. For, even though you may survive without the forest, the forest cannot survive without you. You are the key to this; you are the biggest danger and the only hope. I have seen that you will find a twin. A great psychic will be born. That is lost and in the darkness and has had irreplaceable things taken from them but you will deliver them into the light and this great act of good from a pitch black will restore the balance nature intended. You must find this being. You are the only one who will know.”

            The hag’s words echoed in his ears. He knew he was meant to be doing something. He always had but he’d never imagined the effect it could have on the rest of this sacred islands future. He watched the hag leave obviously impressed with her own performance.

“I will be here to council you when it is needed Ghille Dubh. Good luck.”

Then she disappeared into the forest as if the trees themselves had consumed her.

 

And so, Ghille Dubh’s Obsession began to thrive. He became desperate even though the trail of months and years spread out in front of him nothing seemed to be happening. He hadn’t seen anymore forwarding attacks. After a while even the scouts stopped plaguing his regions. Then one night it began. The days had become longer, it was the beginning of the summer and in the shadows creatures began lurking in the short nights. He’d seen their eyes staring back at him; he knew they weren’t the forest critters for they had deserted it long ago. They were cold and heartless staring at him. He didn’t know what to do. Should he have found this “Equaliser” by now was he meant to stop these things from doing whatever they were doing? He didn’t know, so he just watched for now. He was pleading with the gods that these were just more scouts but he knew he was foolish to. He caught a glance finally and realised that these weren’t just minor demons. These were fully fledged, iron toothed vampires, Asanbosam’s followed by groupings of Wargs and Dockalfar with there pale skin and large eyes adjusting well to the dark. Behind them hoards of creatures some that Ghille had never encountered before with strange deformed bodies and animal faces. At the head of the army stood Empusa. She was the Demon of Midnight at this time her strength was at full capacity and nothing could stop her.

            Ghille watched in disbelief. All the waiting he’d done. He’d been certain he’d feel it coming but he hadn’t. Now he didn’t know what to do. He followed the army as they morphed into the trees inconspicuously. They reached house after house clawing on the doors releasing screeches that seemed to come from hell itself. The army took anyone they could from their homes; women, children, it didn’t matter to them. As they made their way through the forest, people fled long before they army had arrived. Thankfully human fear outweighed their stubbornness. The army reached the edge of the forest and turned back each and every one with a hostage. Then the slaughter began. It wasn’t just murder, no, that wasn’t cruel enough for these beasts. They took each one and removed their brains. Then they possessed each one with part of their own blackened hearts. They kept these newly formed creatures and tortured them; they gave them a taste for blood for two days until they released them into the woods. Ghille had tried to stop it but although they couldn’t kill him, they could hurt him and he was hardly strong in comparison to their compelling urges to return home. When they did, they feasted on whatever remained in the houses. Ripping open their families stomachs and devouring their entrails. Few survived the brutalities, and even fewer opted to staying in the forest. Ghille watched sadly as the humans with whom he’d coexisted left him feeling more alone than ever. He did, however, know they would be safer away from the forest perimeter. The forest was what kept these foul beasts alive; they couldn’t survive long in the villages without the magical essence that the trees provided. From that day forth the village of Leszek was founded and every year from then on, for those 3 days, they performed O-bon, the festival of the dead.

 

Ghille Dubh was traumatized by the events for many years and as the village of Leszek grew, so did his obsession. He knew the village was still in danger, although the beasts wouldn’t survive long, he knew the attacks would continue. After a while he became aware of the presence of people in the forest. Ghille swore to himself that he would protect them from onslaught. He followed his senses through the forest far to the western side. He morphed through the shrubs and trees. The land looked familiar, as if hundreds of years before he’d walked these same steps. A childhood image of his mother played out in front of him. She was facing a tree covering her eyes and counting. A young Ghille Dubh was running away from her. He followed the young version of himself who seemed to fade as the memory dripped away he pushed through one last layer of vegetation to reveal a beautiful thatched cottage with roses crawling up the walls. Ivy and honey suckle clung to the stones. The air was filled with children’s laughter.

            Two girls paraded though the ornate doorway their golden hair in tight curls bouncing as they ran. One girl was laughing a quiet, amazed and innocent laugh while the other appeared sullen. They were in each other’s exact likeness. He waited to see if a paternal figure would follow, as his mother often did, but he knew none would. The girls were alone. He had to follow them. He had to make sure they were safe. Somehow he felt connected to them. Alone, looking after themselves, anything could happen to them and Empusa’s army discriminated against none.

            He followed them as they ventured further into the woods until he came to a clearing where he could only see the smiling girl spinning in the long flowered grass. The forest was thin here and only a few trees scattered around. She knelt on the floor and leaned over the large still puddle knees covered in the mud around it. Then the sullen child came into view. Something about that girl made Ghille’s heart race. She placed her hand on the girls shoulder, pushed her into the mud and pinned her down. Ghille couldn’t have comprehended the next procedures. The girl took out a sharpened stick from her apron pocket and the once cheerful girl started screaming as she pressed it into the corner of her eye. The sullen girl slowly and painfully began gouging out her eyes. Blood poured all over the floor and manic laughter filled the air as she tortured her. The girl wasn’t lucky enough to pass out even after the first eye; she didn’t loose consciousness until the second eye had been taken out. The cruel child then proceeded to removing her own eyes. She’d screamed in agony as she’d done so but had continued the botched surgery in an insane ritualistic way. After she had taken out both her own eyes she placed them in her pocket with the sharp stick and pushed her sisters into her own sockets. To Ghille’s amazement she was able to see and her manic laughter continued as she left, leaving her once joyful sister to bleed to death alone.

            He waited for the frightening sister to disappear out of sight before rushing down to the bleeding girl, still trembling from the scene. Her breathing was shallow and her heart was slow. Ghille couldn’t let her die. The bleeding was decreasing but he knew that this wasn’t a good thing. Ripping off the arm of his grass-knit shirt her bound it tight around the girl’s head, the pressure stopping most of the flow. He then took the small child into his arms and strode in his giant leg spans into the forest. The whole forest seemed to be telling him what to do next. He needed a tube of some sort, and quickly. He would need the humans help and so rushed to Leszek.

            The clouds were gathering above the forest as Ghille felt the uncertainty for this girl’s life grow. The closer her got to the forest edge the dustier the earth became and the fewer flowers ventured through the ground. It was as if it was a warning sign. Nature is not welcome, or something of the sort but it was a warning sign he was choosing to ignore today.

            It had been a long time since he’d had face-to-face communication with humans. He didn’t know how they’d react but he didn’t care. All that mattered was saving this girl. On approaching the boundary, Ghille laid the girl behind a small shrubbery as he couldn’t take her with him, the impression would cause uproar. They would think he’d done this devastating act of mutilation.

            He snuck into the village, determined not to sound an alarm, and made his way into a barn. Hung from a girder hung a line of chickens, their necks slit and blood pooled below them. One chicken was on the floor, its head removed and its entrails on the floor. A small boy with downy, brown hair and scarring on his face stared at Ghille his hazel eyes wide with fear.

“Don’t scream. What is your name?”

“Ajax” the boy’s whisper was barely audible.

“I just need that.” Ghille said bluntly pointing at a particularly long strand of chicken intestine.

            The boy, quivering, handed it over. Ghille thanked him and then fled back to the girl. From his pocket he took 2 clean quill tips and attached them to each end of the chicken gut. It was crude but it was all he knew. The girl needed blood. He plunged the quill into his vein and let the green sticky blood flow past the middle point. He was thankful the girl was still asleep. He wouldn’t have been able to bare her screams. He closed his eyes and stabbed the other end into hers. His obscure blood ran into her arms and there was an instant effect. The girls breathing became a little heavier. He picked up once again, making sure not to pull out the mechanism and took her to the birch.

            When he got there, for the first time in hundreds of years, he was tired. By this point the girl’s heartbeat was strong and he felt assured it was time to take the quill out. The pain only lasted for a few seconds and he knew the wound would heal fast so he wasn’t concerned by the deep gash in his arm fold. Next he removed the bandages to inspect the wounds but was shocked to see where fleshy empty sockets should be there were holes that started to expand into deep blackness. He pulled his gave away from staring and began covering the sores with aloe balms and whatever other soothing lotions he had. Then he washed the bloodstains off her face and began weaving her a new linen bandage.

            At one point, the child stirred momentarily but then quickly fell back into her slumber. When Ghille had done, he bound her eyes tight again with the clean cloth and made the journey back to her home. She wouldn’t be safe there and he knew it. But he couldn’t stay with her for she would fear him. He laid her on the dusty path outside the house and watched from a distance as she slowly woke up. She seemed to accept her loss instantly and began feeling around to work out where she was. She lifted her hands to her face and felt the linen, then walked hands stretched out until her fingers brushed her familiar door. She then stumbled in and out of sight. Finally, it clicked.

“Lost and in the darkness and has had irreplaceable things taken from them.”

 

As the months passed, Ghille learnt the girl’s name. Morana, named after the Goddess of death and winter. Not long after he’d saved her life he had protected her from a distance never venturing into the house where her cruel sister Tunda reigned. It was also where familiar ghosts of his past played through his mind. Whenever Morana entered the forest he wouldn’t be far behind. Months seeped into years. Fifteen turns around the sun went by and the young girl had turned into a troubled woman. Her daily ordeals flawed her personality, making her bitter and unbalanced.  Slowly Ghille Dubh became conscious that she knew he was there, he realised she was developing a minds eye. Although physically blind, with concentration she began to build up an image of the world around her. The pictures were dull and imprecise but she clung onto them as if they were the real thing. But working her magic exhausted her. She would often sleep for days after a particularly long spell.

                        It was in the autumn when he decided it was time to begin the huge task of converting the young girl. The sun beat down that day through the thick green leaves and cast an eerie glow over the forest. The sun highlighted the weeds and flowers that he’d studied so carefully. The forest was thriving more than ever this year. It was so beautiful. Then there came Tunda’s awful song. She had apparently become bored of her latest playmate. It was the same routine every time. She sang that awful song that sounded like pure gold and honey to the ears of humans. Then came the chamber where they was enjoyed and then when she became bored forgotten or killed. Whichever sadistic Tunda had decided on that morning. He saw the man she had ensnared almost instantly. Ghille was about to turn his back on the situation when the man turned round. He was familiar. He was quite young with untidy brown hair. There was a thin scar that ran beneath his lip and rugged scaring down by his jaw line. A picture show ran through Ghille’s head of a boy cutting out chicken entrails.

“Ajax,” he whispered as the man fell into the well. A blood curdling scream filling the air and made the birds flee the trees and men retreat to their houses back in the rotting village of Leszek.

            Morana had fled from the scene following instinct rather than magic to deep into the woods. Ghille Dubh followed. Even though he had travelled through these woods thousands of times this part made him feel uneasy. A shadow of foreboding was cast over him, the visions of a life that seemed to have only momentarily lingered in time flashed before his eyes. A young child he recognised to be himself ran through the woods following Morana, as if he were her shadow. Ghille followed the parade.

            The group came to an abrupt stop as Morana fell to the ground, landing on the soft moss. The young Ghille seemed to absorb into her as she fell to the ground, and the strange visions stopped swimming in Ghille’s eyes. She began screaming and wailing into the woods while her hands felt forwards and touched something. She stopped screaming for a few moments while she concentrated. Then the wailing continued. Ghille looked over her shoulder:

 

Maja, loving mother, eternally missed.

Residing in Valhalla a true Valkyry.

 

He recognised his own wobbly, teenage chiselling. Ghille Dubh felt a sharp pang of pain in his chest as memories that seemed to have dulled over the hundreds of years fell on him like waves. He fell to his knees silently and his chestnut eyes filled and emptied of tears. The forest had provided him with a home, a reason for existence, but it had taken away his grief too, the thing that would have kept him human. It was bitter sweet to cry. It was a bodily function he’d not done since he’d connected with the forest. He had felt yes, but not to this extreme, the emotions he felt had always been dimmed as time seemed to engulf them.

            Morana twitched. She must have heard him for now she was concentrating again, building in her minds eye. Ghille pulled himself to his feet and fled. This girl had to be the one. His blood had strengthened her extrasensory powers and she would remove the darkness from the forest and Ghille Dubh wouldn’t be alone again. He needed to take her to the Seer.

 

It wasn’t long before he could take her. It felt peculiar that this woman that lay on his bed now was the same girl from 15 years earlier. She only slightly resembled her once beauty. Her golden curls were lank and dirty and cut jagged and uneven. Her empty eyeless sockets were dark like a tunnel with no light at the other side. He couldn’t pull himself away from those eyes. They screamed all the things he feared yet he knew them all. He wasn’t afraid of her. He didn’t scream like those who had seem them before did. He didn’t fall to his knees in fear. He already knew the loneliness he felt now would stretch on as long as life did on the wretched island. He moved softly, he’d woken her up once already and she had simply blacked out. It was for the best, he supposed, he didn’t need her running away; he needed to know whether this was it or not.

 

“So is it her?” He asked Likho eyes praying to her for his search to be over.

“No” the Seer spoke bluntly.

“What?”

“This isn’t the prophesised on Ghille. You know it because there isn’t the connection. Those are the facts.” Likho replied

“It all fits. A psychic, a twin, a child whose childhood was scarred by an irreversible action and one of the darkness brought to the light… ”

“Yes that is true but she is not in the light. I am a Likho and a Seer Ghille Dubh. I know this girls future. She won’t be the equaliser. But you’re futures are tied.”

“Just tell me where to find the one…” Ghille Dubh stopped for a moment. As he glanced over to Morana he noticed her breathing pattern had changed. She was awake. “We will speak later” he said dismissing the hag.

“Morana, it’s time for you to go home now. I understand we didn’t get off to a good start but I will make it up to you.” He said, as his rosemary scent grew closer to her.

Soon the girl was unconscious again and Ghille was carrying her in a very similar way to the way he had 15 years ago. He laid her as comfortably as possible in front of her house and watched from a distance, as the girl woke stroked her fingers across the floor and sighed.

Ghille was crestfallen. All the searching had amounted to nothing. He shuffled his feet as he returned to the hag.

“She will be the messenger. Without her your fate can’t come to pass. But she must face one more ordeal…” The hag placed a sharp stone in Ghille’s hand “do you understand?”

Ghille understood what the hag wanted but not why. He also understood that she never revealed things unless she needed to. It was the infuriating thing about neutrals. It pained Ghille Dubh to know what he was going to do. He held the stone firmly in his hand and it cut in deep. His heart thudded and adrenaline filled his body. Why must he do this?

He wandered in his blissful forest and contemplated the results of this. On one hand he would be destroying something that was keeping Morana human. On the other hand, it would be a step towards the ultimate goal. What was one loss in the face of hundreds?

He felt himself walk but it was like he wasn’t in control it was surreal. He found himself outside Morana’s house before he knew it. He saw Morana go to the cellar and heard Ajax’s screams. He prayed that she’d done the horrible deed that he had been instructed to do. Then he heard her feet patter up the stairs. He slipped through the shadows and entered.

            Ajax was hunched against the well wall rocking slowly his breathing panicked.

“Ajax?” Ghille’s voice rang through the air.

            Ghille Dubh was sure Ajax had recognised his voice but he just flinched as he glided towards him. He pitied him. He had felt the power of those empty sockets even if he wasn’t affected. But a human? Humans don’t have the mental capacity to understand the sheer quantity of the knowledge they parted with. Ghille opened the cell door and placed his hand on Ajax’s shoulder.

“Do you want the pain to stop?”

            Ajax avoided eye contact but nodded vigorously. Ghille clenched the stone again. Sharp pain filled his hand again momentarily. He could take away the pain other ways.  He knew ways to make him forget what he saw. But for some reason his body seemed obedient to the Seer’s wishes. He pressed the cold implement into Ajax’s hand. Thankful eyes met with his. He mustered a fake smile and walked away. He didn’t look back. He was disgusted by his actions. He was disgusted by the sound of ripping flesh. He was disgusted by the sound of dripping blood. No, Ghille Dubh couldn’t go back.

 

He half wished he hadn’t gone forwards either, because when he saw a blood drenched Morana running towards him. Her bright blue eyes glowed in the dark. She had regained her eyebright. He pushed himself against the cellar wall into the shadow and waited. He heard her shrill calls and watched her hold the dying man close to her and press her lips against his. Ghille felt a familiar pang of emotion made his heart hurt. He didn’t understand this concept. She hardly knew this man. Yet she shared her lips with him. She took his last breath into her kiss.

Ghille Dubh had placed both his hands with their long fingers on her shoulders. She stared up at him.

“You planned this.” She said numbly

“No. This was your fate. I didn’t know Ajax would die. I didn’t know you would kill your sister. But I do know what you need to do now. You are Vesna now. The messenger. The Bozaloshtsh.”

 

Ghille leaned in to whisper in her ear. Not even the tree spirits could hear this. The tree spirits were neutral but could be swayed.

“You understand where suicides go don’t you?” he spoke hoping his tone wasn’t too harsh.

Morana nodded. “Odin will take his soul to fight in Ragnarök whether they win or loose his soul will then be tortured.”

“Do you know my connections with Odin?”

She shook her head, her eyes brimming with tears. Ghille needed to quicken his pace or he was going to loose her.

“I’m Odin’s illegitimate son.” It felt so peculiar to be saying those words aloud for the first time in his long life and almost being proud that they were true. “I can save his soul and he will join my mother in Valhalla where he will wait for you’re time to come.”

Morana grabbed his hand. Begging with her beautiful blue eyes for him to do it.

“I can only do this if you help me though.” Crunch time. “There is going to be one born. A great psychic, who will remove the evil from the woods, evil like your sister and equalise it for both human, creature and hybrid. But you have to guide the slain and stop the equaliser from coming to that fate. Doing this will earn Ajax the passage to better lands.”

She eyed him quizzically for a moment then sighed “Vesna. I will take this role though it hurts me so.”

Then nodded once more, motioning for him to leave. Then she sobbed a little but slowly the sobs turned into wails, which in turn turned into a blood curdling, heart freezing screaming screech that echoed off the circular walls and filled the forests. The sound chilled Ghille’s heart as he walked into the forest ashamed of his actions.  He called to his father through the wood spirits. Odin, the chief of the gods replied with his usual tranquil silence. The swaying of the tree’s, the freshness of the air and the new spring flowers coming through in the ground told him that his father, though had no hand in his upbringing, though he had left him alone in the world to feel like an outcast, a freak, would still do anything for him.

He listened to the screams that had now stopped paining his ears. He hated what he’d done to her. The hurt he’d made her feel yet, despite her pain, he knew that he wanted more than anything was to feel what Ajax and the newly christened Vesna felt for each other. He would go through any amount of pain to feel the connection that they did. The forests freshness suddenly became obsolete in his mind. It didn’t matter how beautiful the forest was, how stunning the sunrise was or how long his life would last. None of that mattered unless he had someone to share it with.

 

The days dripped by slowly after that. The endless parade of days and nights, months and years spilled out into the endless abyss of time and Ghille remained just outside his birch. He had decided it was pointless to write these sorts of days. There was no need. Every day was just the same. So he just stayed still. Never leaving. Never moving. Hoping that a kind of death would take over him as he grew to be part of the tree itself. He never slept; he never needed to. It came to a time when the idea of immortality became momentarily unbearable and he just longed to be mortal. He had felt human presence in the forests again. The attacks had subdued and the population had exploded in Leszek. The small village became no more than a slum to people who couldn’t build their own homes, or were too late to scavenge the ones that hadn’t rotted away. Ghille saw all this but didn’t move. He watched young couples enter and share their bodies, away from prying eyes and judgement of their community. As he saw these from his birch he wished he understood. His heart felt cold and he almost hated them. He knew he’d missed out.  Although he physically resembled similar ages to them, his heart and mind were hardened by time. He had missed this stage. While he was their age, he lived a solitary life in the forests. Alone. He’d never really considered himself that before. He’d always had the creatures in the woods and when they left, the humans nearby. But now, while life was flooding back into the forest, he’d never felt more so. It sickened him. He closed his eyes and waited.

            The years washed over him as he sat resentfully by the birch. Then something stirred him one day. A sound that summed up exactly how he felt in one long pitiful wail. He began pulling his eyes open slowly as they had crusted over from years of motionless depression. In front of him a girl, no older than five or six years old, was knelt down with her face buried in her hands. Soft red hair fell down her shoulders and trailed onto the floor. She was the one making those awful wailing sounds.

            Limb by limb he pulled himself from the birch his body had fused to. Slowly, very slowly, he creaked from his tree and stooped over her. The bark fell from his face leaving pale yellow sapling skin

“Why are you crying, little girl?” He whispered in her ear.

She flinched and cowered from him.  He touched the ground and beneath her forget-me-nots sprung up.

“Your tear-drops are falling like dew on the little blue flowers at your feet. Are you lost?”

The girl nodded and looked up to him. He smiled kindly at her. It had been a long time since he’d last smiled it almost ached to do it! She took his hand and looked at him with pleading eyes.

“You’re mother will be worried. Come, I will take you to her.”

He pulled her up and stooped slightly so she could cling onto his hand. He didn’t know where he was going, so he let the forest guide him. They walked for many miles and the girl became weary so Ghille took her into his arms and continued. He knew what this place was. He could feel it before he saw it. The evil that dwelled there chilled his soul. A thatched cottage with crispy brown roses crawling up the walls stood in front of him. Ivy and honey suckle clung to the stones and filled the air with a fantastic fragrance. Along with the perfume, the scent of death clung to the air. Vesna and Tunda had resided here. He pictured Tunda’s room, the blood all over the walls and Ajax, poor Ajax, rotting away in his hole. Ghille wanted to run away but he couldn’t just leave the little girl. This child was the only thing that he’d had true contact with over the years. He’d felt so alone yet in the company of this silent child he felt almost alive, like he had so many years ago, playing with his mother. If it wasn’t for that damn house.

He took the girl to the ornate doorway and rapped quietly on the door. He was ready to flee once he knew the girl was safe. As he was about the leave the girl pulled him down towards her and whispered to him.

“Thank you Ghille Dubh.”

            He didn’t know what to say to her. He didn’t even know stories of him had still existed. Sure he’d heard utterings about himself in passing. But they were all awful lies that were twisted versions of his own, sad story. Many of them claimed he’d killed his own mother and organised the attacks but this girl didn’t seem afraid.

            The door creaked open and a middle-aged woman with a brown dress with a ripped hem and dark curls pulled the girl into her arms and sobbed momentarily.

“Norna! I was so worried. I thought…the Wargs…and oh I’m just so glad you’re home!”

            Ghille Dubh felt like he was merging into the background, so began to walk back to the woods. It hurt to look at them together.  He thought he’d learnt so much whilst living his solitary life in the forest but now he realised how oblivious he was to all these emotions, all these relationships.

            A small pale hand touched his back. He turned round to see the dark haired woman on her tiptoes; she barley came up to his chest.

“Thank you gentle Ghille Dubh for helping my daughter. I was so afraid. You know what the forest is like. There is a Plakavac, I know that, but I try my best to give them a good home, safe…you understand?”

            This woman didn’t fear him either. She wasn’t nervous. Her eyes shone. She wasn’t like the superstitious people of Leszek. She was one like his mother; a follower of nature. She had no reason to fear him and finally he felt like he had a reason to stay active in the forest, a reason to continue his search.

“There is something coming and you won’t have to worry about your daughters safety. Until it comes, I will protect your house to the best of my ability.”

The woman looked up at him thankfully while he looked down unsure of why he’d promised that.

            Norna looked up at him. Her eyes were wide, with a grey iris and a blue ring around it.

“Norna, you’re named after the goddess of fate.”

 

Ghille Dubh often paid visits to the house after that day and watched Norna and her twin brother grow. He enjoyed their company more than he’d ever expected, as they played in the forest together. Their favourite game was hide-and-seek and Ghille was happy to oblige even if he did have an unfair advantage. He taught whatever animals were left in the forest not to fear his young playmates and they never betrayed this trust. They never threw stones at the birds or chased the badgers with sticks like the village children. They were special. Ghille Dubh just wanted them to grow up happy, a privilege he never received. He wanted them to feel accepted despite their differences from other children. They were very different. They communicated to each other without ever speaking a word and had private conversations that not even Ghille could sense. The mystery of these children fascinated him but he never wanted to know everything. He feared the day they grew older and he’d be left alone again.

            Time passed and Ghille became afraid that it would hurt too much to watch them age and be hardened by the world. He became increasingly panicked that he would have to watch them grow old and die and so decided to phase himself out of their lives hoping that they would slowly forget him and dismiss him as some kind of imaginary friend. He would still watch the house but he couldn’t be a part of their lives anymore. It hurt too much.

            It began by him only visiting every other day, then it became once a week. Slowly, it was as if he’d never been a part of their day-to-day routine. There embarked a long silence between him and the family and, although he tried to convince himself it would be better in the long term a family, loneliness struck him. He felt the urge to return to his long sleep again instead of maintaining his search, his apparent fate, but one day a soft voice called into the forest

 “Ghille Dubh, come out come out wherever you are.” 

The voice was heavenly to his hurting heart. Norna wouldn’t forget him. He couldn’t stand to ignore her and hide. He hated this self-inflicted seclusion. He climbed the tree nearest to him and waited for her to find him. If she saw him he would talk to her again. If not then he wouldn’t. That would be that.

“Look up now please!” He willed her as she began to walk under the tree.

He saw the flash of her sunset hair beneath him. She was going to walk past him. He just knew it; his heart sunk as she passed under his tree. Then she backtracked a step and her sensuous eyes looked up at him and smiled her beautifully innocent smile. Ghille smiled back. It felt good to smile even if he knew that the smiles would stop one day.

            He lowered himself from the trees and walked with the young girl who was slowly flowering into a stunning woman. Soon her physical appearance would make him look as if he were a young companion, instead of one who was hundreds of years older. Her age was only a few years younger than his had been before the physical process ended for him. He envied her short years and her delicate body. He walked with her a little while and her arm linked onto his. Ghille Dubh remained his usual frigid self. He didn’t know how to react to this girl. She was beautiful yes. Physically their ages matched. She really was beautiful…Stop. 

            This wasn’t going to happen. Ghille had other agendas to take care of. This human couldn't slow him down. He couldn’t let himself become any more attached to her than he was.

“It wouldn’t be fair on you.” He said thinking only of the injustice it would be to himself.

            He pushed away her arm from him and scrunched his face for a moment then without looking at her face, for he knew it would be one of disappointment, he turned away.

“I have to go away Norna. For a long time. Forever. I have to do this.”

Her tiny hand touched his back momentarily and then she was gone. She disappeared into the woods just as Ghille would from her life.

It took hours for him to get back to the birch that day. His usual long strides seemed useless. He felt as if he was taking two steps forwards and one back constantly. He was weary and for the first time in hundreds of years just wanted to fall into a bed and sleep. Sleep the years away. Sleep this constant nagging at the back of head away. When he finally arrived he knew it had been too much to ask for. Likho stood there clad in black as always. His heart fell further. Today was getting worse and worse.

“They will be born into the darkness soon. Times of great pain are coming. You must find them quickly or all this planning, all this work, will be useless,” and without waiting for a response she left.

            He stumbled through the rotting gap and practically crawled to his dried leave bed. His head fell to the pillow and for the first time in centuries, he slept. It was a comforting, dreamless sleep.

 

Ghille Dubh slept on uninterrupted until a blood curdling echoed into his hollow home. He bolted upright. Vesna. She was calling directly to him. Her shrill scream could be heard everywhere when someone was going to die. It was her job as the Bozaloshtsh but since he had given her this position he had never heard it. He had sensed it of course, but he had never been able to hear it so clearly. It had never been this painfully, soul chillingly loud. He rubbed the bark like, mucus from the corners of his eyes and slipped out of his bed. He made his way through the forest following the sound of that awful cry. He knew the sorrow that call contained and he pitied her. At least he’d gotten away from the pain that apparent true love caused.

            As he travelled to the source of the sound it occurred to him just how long he’d slept for. The spring flowers had disappeared from the forest and had been replaced by sodden dead leaves, winter was fast approaching him. Almost two seasons had passed as he slept away. His mind wondered through thoughts of why he’d needed to sleep so badly as he wondered to Vesna. He couldn’t be bothered with this hassle. Perhaps she’d had enough, and stopped caring where Ajax went. Perhaps she wanted out of the deal. A smug look came across his face. So true love wasn’t that important. He meandered now. Slowly and casually following the sound, not even noticing that he had just passed a duel grave marker. Not realising that he was fast approaching a familiar thatched cottage. It didn’t register in his mind where he was until he heard the rip of flesh, a completely different rip than Ajax’s had made. That had been a sharp cut in then a drag. There was no cut, just savage ripping. He heard the spray of blood and the sound of adolescent screams and for the first he heard the twins silent conversation amongst the screams of their dying mother.

“There’s no point”

“We have to save her!”

“We’re next sister.”

 

Vesna was sat under the window screaming. Her porcelain skin was grey with a blue-green tinge to her cheeks. Ghille ran to her and placed a hand on her shoulder as he went numb when he saw the iron-toothed vampire bite into the boy’s neck. Vesna went to her hands and knees and wretched as her stomach contents projected from her mouth into a pool on the floor. It splattered onto Ghille’s feet and legs but he didn’t flinch. He needed to save Norna. He didn’t know what he’d do with her after he’d saved her but he needed to do at least that for the child that had brought him such joy for such a short time.

            As he moved to help a strange scene began to take place. As the scavengers drew closer to her there was a growl from Fenrir, king of the Wargs.

“She’s mine.” He grunted as he moved towards her. He rumbled words so low and quiet Ghille couldn’t hear them. Norna pressed against the blood-spattered wall. A Jaud approached her. It was a male Jaud. His hair was dirty blond; he had a sharp jaw and a pallor face. Vesna pulled at his arm and spoke quietly.

“I know him!” with wide eyes, “He has feelings, he’s got humanity still!”

Ghille could sense it as well. This creature didn’t want to harm the terrified girl; he wanted to help her! But the feelings were dampened when Fenrir threw him against the floor and the average cool persona of a Jaud took over the man’s body. There were more whisperings.

“I want the pain to stop” her heard Norna say as the man took her into an embrace.

He bit her slender wrist and enclosed the wound in his lips, drinking the sticky liquid that erupted from her.

            Ghille had a choice. He could stop this now. Norna would die but that was a better fate than becoming vampirised. He urged himself to move in, to stop this but he couldn’t. Tears ran down his face as he watched her drink the Jaud’s blood and begin writhing in pain as her human body died. He watched her small breasts rise and fall as it started to take over her body. He tried to pull away but he couldn’t. He stared through that window for hours waiting for the transformation. He needed to see it to be sure it was happening. Her body rose of its own accord and he was certain she saw him. At that moment he managed to pull away. And he ran. He left Vesna by the window and he ran. And he didn’t stop running until he’d passed Leszek. He passed his birch and he still didn’t stop running until he erupted out of the far side of the forest. He was further away than any human had explored. He fell to his knees and a small cloud of dusty sand burst around him. The salty air washed over him and the blue-grey sea washed up against his thighs, the foam sticking to him. His hands grabbed at his hair and he pulled hard, as he bellowed into the air a despairing cry. Hot tears ran down his face and thick green blood seeped from under his shirt as his heart bled for her.

 

He didn’t know how long he’d stayed like that but he’d watched the tide flow back and forth more times than he’d bothered to count. Time meant nothing to him. All he had was time. Something had happened to him that day he’d left Norna in the forest. Why had he slept so long? Why had he felt so…foul when he’d woken up? He’d never felt like that. He had always been the person that when asked to jump he’d respond with “how high?” he was a servant to the forest. If only he’d woken up sooner. Or he’d hurried to meet Vesna. He could have saved the whole family.

            Likho. It had been that foul woman. It must have been. That hag must have done it to him. Was this all part of her master plan that he’d never questioned before? Why did so many have to die in the route towards good? It didn’t make sense. Question’s kept bubbling through his head as the tide came in and out. Scum from the sea foam had lingered on his legs but he didn’t move. The forest and Likho’s plan could wait. His brain nagged at him. He should be searching for the one to stop this happening again. No, damn it. It could wait. For the first time in his life Ghille Dubh did the most selfish thing he could fathom. He did nothing.

 

The forest grew dark without Ghille’s immediate presence. He was close enough for it to survive but it didn’t flourish. Spring should have been approaching but constant turmoil of sleet and hail stopped the flowers blooming. Without Ghille Dubh’s consistent monitoring the seasons, the weather ran amuck. The dark armies drew into the forest again spurred by the mayhem. Instead of bunching back to Leszek, new villages formed around the far side outskirts of the forest. The forest was slowly emptying of people.

 

Ghille Dubh didn’t know what to do. He was angered that he’d let himself feel such self-pity. Yet he’d squeezed every bit out of the pity he could. He knew he should be grieving, so he had grieved. He wasn’t even sure he’d truly felt the depression that had come over him. Perhaps he was just emotionally numb now? If so, that was a good thing. He couldn’t allow a petty thing like emotions get in his way again. If he truly cared for the humans, which he wasn’t certain he did, he had to stay focused. The time he’d spent looking out on the Grey Sea his mind had been almost blank. The mesmerising movement of the water lapping in had been soothing but now he had to move. With that he pulled his legs out of the sludgy sand and stood his toes wrinkling in the mire. He turned and faced the forest.

            Slowly and unwillingly he made his way back into the forest. It felt dark and cold to him. It was as if it wanted to shun him for leaving it for so long. Ghille Dubh did not want to be here. He threw his fist at the nearest tree and felt pain erupt for a moment then it disappeared. Why was he making himself do this? We did he feel that he needed come back here. Humans. Those pathetic things needed him. He loathed them so much yet he longed for them to see him and accept him. He hated them because they were blind. He loved them because could die. He didn’t owe those wretched creatures anything. They owed him.

            The birch wasn’t how he left it. Ghille liked to think that the chaos in his room was organised chaos. He knew where everything was. He knew which shelf, or pile every book was on. He knew where everything was and how he’d left everything because he kept everything the same. The bed was made. He had left it untidy. It was a minute detail in the mass of things but it mattered to him. It meant someone had been here. He didn’t understand why with all this knowledge in one room the only thing an intruder would do, is make his bed. A shrill cackle came from behind him.

“You took your time.” The voice rattled but was strangely soft and feminine.

He slowly turned to face the intruder. Norna. But his playmate was not how he’d hoped, but exactly how he’d known, she would be.

            Her once curly, sunset hair was a matted and copper. Her pink freckled skin was now a corpse white and her pouting lips were grey and chapped. It was as the vibrancy of her being had been drunk by the Jaud. She was attractive still. Hey eyes were still the same. They told a different story now though. She wasn’t a child anymore. Her body would remain a little on the pubescent side but she was a fully-fledged woman with desires and Ghille Dubh could see straight into them. The way she was looking at him scared him. Her short ripped dress exposed the majority of her legs and there was barley any fabric covering her chest area.

“Norna…what are you doing here?”

“My name is Jaud.” She said fiercely moving closer towards him as he backed away. 

She moved so enticingly. Her hips her whole body seemed to squirm as she walked towards him with her eyes undressing him. Ghille wanted to run away. What the hell was this? He’d only just promised that he wouldn’t let emotions get in the way and here he was with this sensuous girl, woman, and he was panicking. He felt his heart thud in the back of his head as it pressed against the wall. No escape now. She reached up and pinned his shoulder against the wall. She was tiny but she had immense power over him. She pulled down his head and forced his lips against hers. Her tongue ventured into his mouth and she felt his hardness between them. Ghille flushed as much as his green skin would allow him to. He didn’t know how to deal with this but he didn’t want her to stop. She pulled him towards the bed and her hands began touching him.

Stop it! This isn’t Norna.

“This isn’t happening.” He thought aloud.

“What?” Her eyes were flaming. Her response hadn’t even sounded like a question.

“This…This isn’t going to happen. With Norna maybe it might have but you’re not Norna. I don’t know who the fuck you are, but I think you should get out of my house.” Ghille heard his voice shaking as he spoke.

Yeah real intimidating the voice in his head mocked.

She was furious. She clenched and unclenched her fists repeatedly. Their eyes met and the stare down began. It lasted over a minute before she kicked over a pile of books, shouted “God Damn.” And stalked out of his birch.

            Ghille’s head fell and he breathed steadily. He really must have been away from the forest a long time. The ammonia must have worn off. He made a note to himself to recreate the protective circle. He went to his knees and began restacking the books in order. He couldn’t get her out of his head. She had looked so fantastic…

For a corpse maybe.

Ghille shook his head. Never mind being away from the forest for too long, the voice in his head was clearly evidence he’d been alone for far too long.

 

The voice was mocking and never let him rest. Ghille Dubh found himself constantly weary and the obnoxious voice just wouldn’t shut up. He couldn’t continue his work because that mocking sound just rang in his head day and night. Where had it come from? If it was a part of him it would have his voice but it didn’t. It was like a person who lived in his head just to mock and laugh at him. He could only put it down to loneliness. But he couldn’t just go crazy in a normal way like everyone else. He wasn’t making up friends. He was making an enemy.

Way to go.

“Shut up.” Ghille spoke childishly to himself.

            He’d been walking for sometime now. Usually when the sun set he made his way back to his birch but it held nothing for him at the moment. None of this wretched forest did. He just kept walking. The moon was above him, the beautiful silvery moon smiling at him; winking at him.

            There was no wind that night but the trees above him were clattering together. His senses awake and every hair on his body twinged. He could hear breathing then the twigs behind him snapped. He spun round.

“Get the fuck away from here. I’m going to have to kill you and I don’t want too do that.”  The Jaud screeched. It was Norna’s Jaud.

“So what? I’ve been dying since that day. Kill me, it’ll make no difference.”

Within moments she had swung her leg around his and pulled him over then she pinned him down. She swung a punch square into his face but Ghille didn’t react. She removed himself and threw him across the opening into a tree.  Ghille Dubh didn’t care. He’d felt worse.

“They said I’d forget you. I’ve been trying my best to but you won’t go away! How can I forget you with you protecting me all the time?” She screamed.

“I haven’t been protecting you. You put this stupid voice in my head. You want me to leave? Is that what will make you happy?” Ghille felt like he was disappearing into the trees as Jaud nodded.

He wasn’t sad. He was just angry. This girl had no control over him.

Why have you left then?

“Shut the hell up.”

 

As time passed it was easier to ignore the voice and it became just a distant whisper. It was now time to revisit the hag. It had been a while since she’d said that the equaliser would be born. “Soon” to this woman could mean hundreds of years. Thinking back he had no idea how long it had been since she had told him it would be soon. The mountain pass was some distance from his residence and, since he didn’t want to come against a Jaud again, he began his journey at sunup.

            Years ago, the sounds of birds and the animals venturing out to see if it was safe for them yet would have brightened his mood. Today, it didn’t brighten anything but it did make him more tolerable. He didn’t understand why sometimes journeys to the far side of the forest took what seemed like minutes and others it took the full day.

            Today seemed to be a good day. His movements were swift and the forest seemed willing to let him by. It wasn’t long before he was approaching the towering mountain. That place gave him chills. He wouldn’t have been surprised if lightening crashed down around it, it would be quite fitting. He knew this was where the Wargs resided as well as the rest of the dark army. He didn’t fear them, but would rather not go against them alone. He saw the mutilation they caused to the villages and would rather not be caught up in that. There was a small dirt path that lead round to the far side of the mountain; he followed it to meet Likho. 

            Where the grassy slope turned to rocky inclines there was a small crack that Ghille Dubh had to crouch to get through he squeezed past rocks for a long time until the crack of daylight seemed to disappear behind him and an orange flickering light appeared in front of him.

“How nice of you to come visit me Ghille Dubh. It’s been far too long. Won’t you take a seat?” The old lady smiled her sick smile.

Ghille’s nostrils flared. He hated this innocent old woman act. She didn’t look like a kind grandmother, she certainly didn’t behave like one when she was angry and she didn’t sound like one. She might be neutral but this woman was foul.

“Good day Likho.” Ghille spoke coldly.

“Come on now dear…sit by me”

Ghille rolled his eyes but obeyed slumping down on the hard rock opposite her.

“What’s going on? You said it would be over soon.”

“Now now dear, have some stew, I never said that it’d be over soon. I said they would be born soon.”

            Ghille felt his anger bubbling over. She was winding him up. She knew who he was meant to be looking for. And she knew that he knew that. She had practically made him kill for this cause and she wasn’t helping at all. She was just a selfish old hag who had nothing better to do other than meddle with the lives of others. The silence hung over them. He refused to break the silence. Likho broke some bread and started chewing it slowly, all the time staring at Ghille. It was as if she was waiting for him to work something out. They sat like that for a long time before he stood up and stormed to the winding stalagmites to the exit.

“You will love her more than life itself.” He heard the old woman say as he stormed down the hillside.

            He considered going back but he knew that would be the only advice she gave him. She was pathetic. This whole quest was pathetic.

Not as pathetic as you.

“Oh great. You’re back.” He winced as the voice boomed in his head, apparently overcoming whatever he had put in its way before.

 

He ventured back into the forests but the daylight had fled and darkness had encased the sky. He was certain he hadn’t been in there long yet the sun that was still high in the sky when he’d entered was only a linger of orange on the sea horizon. It was peculiar. As he began to make his way through, the forest seemed to be screaming at him. Something was very wrong. His heart was aching. He shouldn’t be here. He knew he wasn’t safe. His heart was thudding. Thud. Thud. Thud. He felt physically sick. What was happening to him? There was a scream that shattered the air. But it wasn’t the scream of the ever vigilant Vesna. It was a familiar scream. The one he’d heard that fateful day. When Fenrir had taken his precious Norna from him. It was Norna.

            He followed the sound deeper into the forest and found himself at a gruesome sight. On the floor a young man laid, his guts spewed all over the floor. An eternal look of fear in his eyes. Somehow, he wasn’t quite dead, but there was nothing to save him. Knelt with her head pressed into the sticky soil Norna, or the Jaud of her, whichever this was, was silent. He went over to the shaking man. He felt more pity for him than he had for Ajax. The man’s eyes were wide and pleaded with him.

Kill him.

For once the irritating voice was right. It was the only merciful thing to do. In one quick movement Ghille took the man’s head and broke it. The man didn’t even scream but a glint in his eyes spoke to Ghille.

“Thank you.”

            He approached Norna and leant over her, afraid of this being a trick. She didn’t move. He placed his arm around her and she lolled backwards into his arms. Her eyes wide and unblinking, her awful grey lips, her putrid breath. He despised her. This had to be a trick. He dumped her on the ground and pushed off his hands to stand up. On his hand a thick black liquid stuck to his fingers. Even with his exceptional vision Ghille couldn’t work out what it was. He placed one of his fingers in his mouth and tasted. It tasted sweet. He wanted more. He licked it off another finger but then he froze. Pictures passed in front of his eyes he was looking out through someone else’s eyes. They looked down at their arms and picked up a small, sharpened, shard of wood that was covered in blushing red blood. They began dragging the blade through there arms and the woods began to gush with blood. Black blood. Ghille shook the images from his head and fell to his knees before Norna. He checked her arms. The wounds were deep. They were still bleeding. He needed to do something. He’d let her die once he couldn’t allow it to happen twice.

She’s a Jaud. This isn’t Norna

“Don’t you think I don’t know that?!” he bawled at himself.

He took the Jaud into his arms carried her to his home.

            She had been unconscious for a long time now.  The darkness was passing and the light began filtering through the cracks in his birch. He threw cloth over all the ones he could. He pulled the itchy blanket over all her exposed flesh including her face. The light wouldn’t kill her but it would defiantly hurt when she awoke.

“Ghille? Is that you?” A weary voice came as she pulled herself from under the covers.

“Don’t move. You’re ill. Very ill and I’m in danger even having you here. Fenrir will find you. And he will kill me.”

“I must go. My king will want me for the next meal…” her voice trailed.

“Since when have you ever done what you’re meant to?” He was angry. He had risked his life and all she could think about was that old wolf.

She looked down at her arms and tears ran down her dirty face.

“I didn’t ask for this Ghille. I just wanted to forget them.” She sobbed.

“Never forget them. It’s the only part of you that’s still human. ” He snapped.

“I’m still me, I just have to find other ways to survive…”

“There are other ways to survive than torturing people.”  Ghille knew his tone was cold but for the moment he didn’t care. But looking at the sobbing woman, he couldn’t help but feel pain for her.

He slipped his hand into hers and put his head against hers, just like they had when she was a child.

“There are other ways. You’re taking the easy way. You can take another way. ”

A fresh flood of tears ran down Jaud’s face and onto her chapped grey lips.

“I need to stop. I need help. I come to you broken. I need fixing Ghille. You always fixed me when I was a child, when I cut my knees. When me and my brother fell out of trees.” She brimmed up again. Jaud’s never cried. “Fix me now please I’m begging you.”

            Ghille Dubh bowed his head in thought for a moment. Was this serious? He would do anything for this woman. Likho’s voice echoed in his head “You will love her more than life itself.” And in that instance he knew he did love her. Else, he loved Norna, but was this Jaud really her or was she something completely different? Either way, Ghille had never been more certain. He had found the one he was meant to find.

“Norna. I will teach you other ways. I will be a servant of the darkness.”

 

Jaud’s passion for life grew steadily as she began learning from Ghille. He taught her science and spirituality, the natural and man made, the complete duality of life in the forest. Her eyes and mind devoured everything just as they had when she was a child. Although these lessons provided food for her humanity and her wounds were healing well, a shadow was cast over their activities. Fenrir would find her soon and her hunger for life essence seeped into her dreams. She hadn’t killed in over a month. She also hadn’t eaten in that long. Mortality to her meant no death from age, but deprivation could still kill her.

            The night came when the Wargs began howling, seeking out their kings bride. Ghille had always been positive that the dark army could never end his being, but he was well aware that they could rip Jaud piece by piece until she was just a pile of disjointed limbs. Jaud had to go back to him. It was the only way she could survive. If she died the war was over and evil would prevail. Ghille had tried to convince himself that he was worried for the war but the nagging voice in his head kept reminding him of the sheer loneliness he’d felt before she had joined him. Although the moon was bright, Jaud lay fast asleep in his bed. He had taught her to endure the stinging sun as protection from what could be waiting for her in the dark.

            He moved to study her. Her lips were grey and chapped as ever. They seemed to stick together from thirst. She couldn’t live how he did. Ghille didn’t need to eat but when he wanted, he could enjoy the forest fruits, the fresh water and nuts that lay on the ground in autumn, anything the forest provided him with.  She needed to eat, but if she ate the ripened berries or drank the water she would die, slowly and painfully.  She couldn’t live without blood.

“Jaud you need to go.” He spoke, softly shaking her.

“What? Why?” Her sleepy, unblinking eyes stared at him.

“Listen to the Wargs. You have to go back.”

“I…I want to stay here, with you. Don’t leave me again,” her voice was quivering.

“I won’t. We can meet in the daylight when Fenrir sleeps. You just have to go to him, lie to him about where you were and we…”

Jaud’s eyes filled with tears.

“Promise?”

“Swear to Odin.”

She flung the blanket off herself and threw her arms around him. Her hard lips pressed against his autumn cheek.

“Tomorrow. At day break,” she whispered before gliding through the door.

            Ghille currently brown skin turned red as the kiss burnt on his cheek. She really was something but if he didn’t find a way to feed her appetite soon she would either die or kill. Both of these would result in a loss for the war.

And a loss for you.

Ghille ignore the voice. He lay on his bed and thought. There had to be a way. He listened to the forest, the tree spirits and hoped for inspiration. Other than the Wargs howls, the only thing he could hear was the sound of his own strong steady heartbeat. Then the idea came to him

            At daybreak Ghille Dubh waited at the fringe of the forest for her. After only a few moments of waiting, he saw her racing down the mountain. She looked deathly pale, more than usual if that were ate all possible. She was dying. It would have to be today. Ghille took her hand when she met him and spoke of his plan. Her eyes widened with fear but she nodded. She was a realist. She knew she would die if they didn’t try this.

            They ran to the birch and stripped the bed of its leaf mattress leaving behind just a pillow and the smooth wood underneath. Ghille opened his modest toolbox and selected the sharpest silver knife he had. He gave it to Jaud, took off his grass woven shirt and lay on the wooden surface. She was shaking but she knew how to do this efficiently, without the mutilation she used to cause doing it.

            Quickly she sliced through the flesh down his chest. Cutting through only the ribs she needed to. Ghille Dubh flinched in pain and his eyes seemed more watery than usual but not a single tear fell in the procedure. She pushed her hand inside, manoeuvring past his unneeded lungs and taking hold of his beating heart. She pulled it into sight and placed the knife over a candle, heating the blade. Ghille’s heart was very different to any she’d seen before. It was a rich mossy green and apple shaped. The knife was not hot enough now.

            She cut through the arteries slowly, as she did the wound cauterised and stopped any bleeding.  She could hear the sound of Ghille’s teeth grinding. The pain must have been immense but he was doing his best not to show it. She placed the heart on the small table next to them. She sat next to him as he stitched the wound quickly. It wouldn’t take long for it to heal. He wiped the blade clean of his sticky green blood as he stood up. It was her turn next. She removed her dirty dress and lay with her back on the cold wood. She attempted to steady her breathing.

            Ghille faced her and felt breathless. She was stunning. She was laying there, naked in his bed. Her perk breasts standing proud, moving up and down as she trembled in fear. He glimpsed at his heart and remembered that this wasn’t for pleaser. This was life or death.

            He leant over her and just to the left of one of her glorious breasts he began to cut. She started writhing beneath him so he placed his arm across her shoulders and pressed down hard. When he had done cutting Jaud was slipping in and out of consciousness. He slipped his hand and removed the blackened rotting heart that lay lifeless behind her lungs. As she grabbed his hand he began stewing his own heart in place with silver thread.

“My heart can sustain us both. Our - connection - and the nature I thrive in will keep us alive.” He gazed down at her in awe.

“I’d give you my heart.” Jaud spoke.

When he thought she was unconscious he replied,” If only you had one to give.”

His voice was cold and it hurt him to think she would leave him at nightfall and go to Fenrir. He felt sick knowing she wouldn’t be his for much longer.

 

The weeks past and she grew strong. Her need to feast on flesh and blood was diminished to the back of her mind. Ghille Dubh could only assume that it was a good thing for she had begun to take on a more radiant appearance. The dull copper hair, although still matted, now shone like the sunrise. Her once grey, chapped lips were soft, pouted and sensual scarlet. Her deathly skin shone silver and her sharpened teeth were only softly rounded now.

            Her attitude had change as well. For the first time since her family had died she felt like Norna again. She felt at peace. It was bizarre that Fenrir hadn’t noticed but Ghille hardly spent a moment considering the implications of that. For the first time in many years, he felt almost happy.

            They met every few days, once or twice a week. Ghille would wait just inside the forest boundary and she would race to see him. She leapt into his arms that day, just like everyday and he took her hand and led her beneath the trees. She was still hungry. He knew she hadn’t eaten for a long time. She was afraid to eat food as the Jaud side of her might reject it but the Jaud side also craved something to digest. Ghille knew what she needed and he’d prepared it for her. In a small vial a green stick liquid rattled she took it from him and drank it greedily. A smile spread on her face as if it were a four-course meal.

            The forest was very much alive that day. He was taking her somewhere special today. He had a gift that he knew she’d appreciate. He took her to a part of the forest he felt had been designed just for her. The tree’s leaned in from the side covering all the sky above them creating darkness, but the ground was still soft and thick with flowers and grass. Because of the near happiness Ghille had felt, spring had followed autumn that year. He was well aware that when he stepped flowers sprung up from beneath his large feet.

            He took her into the middle of it watching her eyebrows rise in amazement.

“I’ve been thinking. You aren’t the child I helped through the woods anymore and you aren’t just a Jaud anymore. So I can’t call you those names anymore.” His eyes shone, he knew she would love this.

She held his hand and said, “So what are you going to call me”

“Zora. It means light of dawn. Because that’s what you are. You’re the light after the long darkness. You are my light after the darkness.”

“Zora,” she repeated softly. “I have a present for you but you can only receive it at the birch.” Her slick smile stretched across her face.

            She practically pulled him home and once they had slipped through the tiny crevice, she sat him down on the bed. She seemed nervous, almost tense and Ghille didn’t understand why. She stood in front of him and pulled her dirty, once-white dress over her head revealing her silvered body in all its glory. She moved up to him and placed one knee between his legs, supporting herself on the bed as she removed his top. He could hear his heart thumping in her chest.

            She pressed her lips against his and slowly their tongues started exploring each other’s mouths. She pulled down his breeches and pushed him backwards onto the bed. She stopped kissing him for a moment and admired him. He was so striking. Her finger followed the vine like markings that covered his chest and arms. Then she rose her finger to the thick scar down the centre. She stroked it.

            The look on Ghille’s face was somewhere between complete terror and immense pleasure. She knew this was new to him, she knew that new things were difficult for him. She pulled his hands up from their grasp on the bed and placed them in the curve of her back and she worked her hips back and forth. Soon the terror faded and his eyes rolled upwards. It lasted hours and hours the sun rose to noon and began to drop back down again.

She gasped for air. Her body was sweating and her hair was tangled. With a final pant Jaud, Zora, fell from her elbows and placed her head on Ghille’s rising and falling chest. He kissed her on her head, listening to his heartbeat in her chest.

“Shit! It’s nearly dark!”  She spoke suddenly

She kissed him on the lips and pulled her clothes onto her silvery body. She made her way to the crack that led to the outside of the birch. And then she was gone.

“I love you,” he whispered to her even though he was sure she was long gone by then.

 

He lay there a little while longer, trying to convince himself what had happened had just happened. It seemed surreal. He smiled.

Finally got the courage.

Ghille wasn’t even irritated by the occurrence of the voice now. He couldn’t care. What had happened was magical, perfect, right.

Right. Just like however many others it was perfect for.

Ghille was disgusted. He knew the voice wasn’t his because he would never think that about his Zora. He’d named her. He’d created the new her. She was perfect.

She didn’t used to be Zora.

“Shut up.”

            Ghille stepped outside the birch and gazed up. The moon was up now. The big silver moon, that smiled and kissed the tree leaves. The moon that tonight was stained with blood.

“Blood on the moon.” He spoke aloud. His voice trembled. Something bad was going to happen. Something bad was happening right now. Thoughts rushed through his head. He had to get to Zora. The forest seemed haunting tonight. The birds and woodland cretins hid. The night gremlins weren’t even raising their mischievous heads tonight. Something was very wrong in the forest tonight. He looked up to the mountain. Likho’s cavern was burning brighter than ever. If that foul woman did anything to harm Zora he would kill her. He would draw the pain out as long as he would feel the pain of her loss.

You shouldn’t have got attached.

“Don’t you think I know that. I know I fucked up, I know.”

            If she survived this he’d have to keep away from her. It was the only way he could save her. No. It was the only way he’d have true peace of mind. He couldn’t be looking out for someone else all the time. He was a solitary creature. He belonged alone. He couldn’t function right with her there. But in his aching, empty chest, he knew he couldn’t function right without her either.

            The forest wasn’t kind to him that night. Roots tried to trip him up and branches tried to ensnare him. He had this overwhelming feeling that the forest wasn’t trying to stop him saving her. It was trying to stop him getting hurt by what he saw. Despite the obstacles, it took only what felt like moments to make it to Likho’s humble abode. She wasn’t alone. Fenrir was there barking orders at her and Zora was laid on the rough stone floor, her eyes wide but unseeing. He couldn’t just snatch her, so he listened.

“I can’t do that Fenrir. I can’t make her love you. I can make her forget the other but love cannot be cast by any charm or hex.”

Fenrir was getting aggressive now. The grey wolf rose into the hags face but Likho didn’t flinch.

“I can’t do it. End of.” She crossed her arms as if to put a full stop to the situation but Fenrir wouldn’t have it.

“You will do what you can, hag.”

His huge paw pressed into her throat her claws stuck into her neck causing blood to seep out a little. Likho winced. She might have immense power, but she was still a very old lady.

“Okay! Okay, I’ll do it.”

There was sorrow in her voice her eyes met Ghille’s as she tried to communicate a plan but Ghille was too overwhelmed by the situation to hear her thoughts. She shook her head and quickly put together a batch of thick black liquid. She held Zora’s nose and instantly she woke up. Then Likho began pouring the burning liquid down Zora’s throat. A horrifying gurgling scream filled the air as she resisted but soon she ran out of air.

            Likho began her long incantation in a language that Ghille had never even heard before.

“A fresh start my love. ” Fenrir’s acrid breath burnt her cheek. “You’ll forget him now. And you’ll take the love I offer to you. And you will be my bride.”

The hag looked sympathetically at Zora and then at Ghille. She had a plan!

She stopped her incantation then with a second thought added “Kochają przewyższa” with a knowing smile.

Fenrir was infuriated and struck down the hag with one swift motion. She lay motionless on the floor.

Zora rose from the floor as if pulled and her arms and head dangled like she was being controlled by some grotesque puppeteer. The blue rings in her eyes turned the same furious red-orange as her hair until they were glowing so bright that they turned white. Her pupils disappeared as her eyes glazed over. Her mouth opened gasping in agony as lumps began forming all over her wrists. They writhed and pushed through her silvery skin producing sharp black points, causing blood to flow. She screamed out in pain, but it wasn’t her voice that was screaming, a strange echoic sound came from her mouth. At the same time muscular arm-like limbs erupted out of her back spraying the ground with blood. The limbs ripped through her flesh as they pulled out and spread revealing a leathery membrane that held them together. Ghille pressed against the wall just in time for Fenrir to pound out of the cavern. He fled like a pathetic stray dog from the mite of this powerful woman.

Then, Zora’s head dropped and her eyes closed. Her body fell limp to the floor. Jaud’s eyes never closed. It was the same for them all. Until death took them, their eyes remained open. He rushed to Zora and placed her head in his knees, stroking her hair. Dead. Breathing came from the far end of the room. Likho was trying to speak to him. He rushed to her.

“Morana, she will save h…In the forest, a clearing, the moon shines through it…Put her there. The next full… moon return to her. The fight is almost over dear.” Likho said clenching Ghille’s hand as her breathing became shallow and she passed away.

            He returned to Zora and took her into his arms and returned to the forest. The clearing wasn’t far from his birch. The ground was soft and some flowers were flourishing around her. He laid her there with her arms on her stomach. She looked peaceful. As if she was sleeping. He cut into his wrist and let the sticky blood drip into her mouth.

Vesna the Bozaloshtsh’s screams filled the air and soon he felt her small hand touch his back.

“This one doesn’t need transporting Morana.” She nodded. “Likho, take her to Valhalla.”

Solemnly Vesna nodded again and left Ghille looking over Zora. He bent down and kissed her on the forehead. As he walked away from her he didn’t glance backwards. He didn’t see that where he stepped the grass had turned brown and lifeless. The clouds above became a gathering blackness blocking out the moon. The rain began. Just as the old stories had said, the seasons were merely whims of Ghille’s attempt at human emotions.

 

The rain continuously hurled itself through the sky as the days and nights passed, waiting for the full moon. Ghille Dubh didn’t move, he just sat waiting, staring at the sun in the day and the moon at night. Waiting for the time to come.

Then the fat silver moon broke through the black clouds and winked down on Fenrir as he pounded through the forest. Ghille had sensed his presence in the forest. He had sensed Zora awakening. He practically heard her eyes snap open. Tonight he would see her again. Within moments he found himself at the clearing. He looked at her from the side and waiting for her to become more aware. Her head was lolled to the side and her tangled, red hair was caked with claylike mud, fell across her pale dirty face. Her wounds had reopened and the blood from her wounds ran freely into the ground.

Her breathing started, as Ghille Dubh began to move towards her Fenrir raced into the clearing and began moving her pressing his disgusting snout into her. It made him sick. He picked up a branch that was lying on the floor with his long fingers and flung it as hard as he could at Fenrir. It struck him across the side and sent him hurling into the trees. He looked like a whimpering wolf not a demonic Warg. He scuttled away into the dark forest but he’d be back.

Ghille took Zora into his arms; her body was limp still and she was loosing a lot of blood. He quickly strode away from the opening, if he’d have had time, he’d have covered his scent, but fact was, he didn’t. Finally, he reached the birch and lay her on the leafy mattress and began to bind her wounds. He stripped her of her blood and mud soaked dress and wrapped around her from her waist up to her under-arms with new white linen. He then started to wrap her arms to cover the awful mutilation from the transformation. He took the cleanest dress he had from when she had lived here from a chest. The underskirt was dirty but the rest of it was moderately clean. He pulled it onto her and waited for her consciousness to return. He clenched her hand and watched her breathing became steadier.  

There was a small gasp and he jumped to Zora’s side.

“You need to drink this,” he spoke quickly thrusting a carved bowl of his foul smelling dark green blood.

 “What…”

“You don’t want to know.”

She put it down. Ghille knew she needed to drink it to keep her going. While she was recovering she needed it. He looked at her for a few moments. Closed his eyes. Then in one quick movement he held her nose, opened her mouth and poured the rancid substance down her throat. It would make her drowsy, her first meal in weeks. Soon she slipped into dreamland. . The moon disappeared and the sun began to kiss the horizon once again. For the first time in almost a month, it wasn’t raining. Ghille supposed that was what feeling hope had done to the weather. She wasn’t waking up. This was taking forever. Ghille dropped her hand in frustration and paced the room for a few moments then took her hand again.

 

“You’re finally awake!” He spoke suddenly, obviously shocking her. “It’s only me.”

“Who are you? How do you know me? Who am I?!” She reeled out question after question.

Ghille knew there was confusion and disappointment on his face. This wouldn’t help. He closed his eyes and pinched his face. It fell back to the emotionless state he’d kept it in for so many years.

“Don’t worry yourself. I’ll tell you soon enough. You just need to trust me.” 

“How do I know you didn’t wound me? How do I know you’re not responsible for all these scars?” She was becoming erratic now.

“Who and what are you?” She demanded again.

“My name is Ghille Dubh. I am many things to many different people. To some I take their teeth when they loose them to make spells to protect them. To some my only role is to protect to forest. To you, I will be your nurse until you remember.” He felt his chest heave as he sighed. It was meant to be so much easier than this.

Good old Likho, never makes it easy.

“Who am I?”

            Pictures. He found that imagery always helped people remember. He took his mirror. The same mirror that he’d momentarily given Vesna sight with before she regained her eyes. He had been given the mirror as a boy. His mother brought it in one day, his birthday maybe, she had it hidden under her apron and she put her finger to her lips. It was their secret. He’d known it wasn’t from the man he called father. He found no attraction in things of such beauty. The mirror was beautiful. The handle and frame looked like were made from tarnished silver, moulded to look like intertwining vines.  On closer inspection they were real vines, they slithered like snakes intertwining with each other. He knew it was magic. He also knew he wasn’t suppose to have it. He kept it hidden at all times, only taking it out to look at when his father wasn’t around. He’d never known whom it was from but as he’d grown older he knew. He’d known from a young age he was different. He was too tall, too sickly looking and too thin. He didn’t like playing the rough games with everyone else. His so-called father had often forced him into games with other boys but they didn’t want him there. He was a freak to them.

            He had been 8 when his mother had finally confided in him. To most 8 year olds finding out the man you called father all your life was nothing to do with your genetic pool would traumatise them. To Ghille Dubh it was the biggest relief of his short life. She told him about a fateful encounter with Odin, about how he’d promised her the son she wanted. He had followed through with this promise and months later Ghille Dubh was born. He wasn’t just different. He was special. She told him he had great things to do in life. The mirror was the only thing that he’d taken with him other than his mother’s corpse when he’d left that critical night.

            Zora studied herself for a while, and then she huffed and dropped the mirror.

“WHAT is my name?”

She was joking. She had to be.

“What do you want your name to be?” He said grinning slightly

“DON’T PLAY WITH ME” She threw the bed covers away from her and the smile disappeared from Ghille’s face.

“You don’t know – at all – you don’t know me – or what you are. You’re not playing are you?”

They both fell silent. Did he tell her what Fenrir had done? Did he tell her that they were meant to be together? That they were, if that’s what it was, in love? He could tell her and it would be over with. Or he could nurse her back to health. Hide her away. Forget this whole war. Just be them two. Forget the mortal life. He chose neither. She would decide for herself. He spoke the words he hated to say.

“You’re kind are called Jaud. You’re name is Jaud. All you’re kind are called the same.” He said

“What do you mean. My kind?”

“A Jaud is a kind of – I don’t know what you remember of the world – I hope you understand this – You were born premature. And you were – I don’t know how to – vampirised – if that’s the best way to put it ”

She was silent. Obviously confused.

“Can I call you Ghille or do I have to say the Dubh?”

“I have to go.” Ghille Dubh said turning quickly from her. “I’ll be back soon, I need some more – of what sustains your life essence – don’t leave the birch.”

He kept trying to convince himself he wasn’t lying to her. But he felt like he was.

            Outside Ghille leant against the side of his birch opposite to the opening crevice. Whipped out an athamé from seemingly out from nowhere and cut deep into his wrist. The blood ran slowly and dripped into a small vial. He corked it and hid it in his palm. When he turned around time seemed to freeze for him. Zora was there, face to face with Fenrir and she was ridged. She wasn’t running. She didn’t remember!

            Fenrir rose onto his back paws and moved to strike her down. Why the hell wasn’t she moving?! He rushed forwards and pushed Fenrir in his ribs. As he began to topple backwards his razor sharp teeth clenched into Ghille’s arm. It felt like things were moving so slowly as the pain erupted around his body.

Snap out of it!

At least the voice and him were on the same wavelength now.

As Fenrir hit the ground Zora suddenly snapped out of it.

“Run! Back to birch, don’t let him get you!” He yelled at her.

He didn’t have chance to make sure she got back safe because before he knew it Fenrir was back on his feet and snarling.

            Standing on his back paws Fenrir was roughly the same height as Ghille, but that position opened him for weakness. So even though being on all fours made him considerably smaller he opted for the less vulnerable stance. Not that, that would matter much the fight was already won. Every time he overstepped the circle, for too long, he felt sick and dizzy. These were the times Ghille struck Fenrir. He knew it was unfair but Fenrir would have no mercy. He continued to beat the wolf back until finally the wolf scuttled away into the miserable forest.

            Ghille dared breath a sigh as he watched the wolf leave. He walked slowly back to the birch gripping his bitten arm tight to stop the flow. Something felt wrong as he approached the crack. He didn’t even have to look in the birch to know she was gone. His head was spinning. Where had she gone? She didn’t know anywhere. She could have got to anywhere; he had no idea how long he’d been fighting Fenrir. Time meant very little to him. The sun was higher in the sky now. Much higher. Noon from the looks. He needed to find something to lead him to her.

Calm down.

He hated to admit it but this voice was beginning to become more helpful than an hindrance. He took the voices advice and began breathing slowly. Clues. There was always evidence of movement. There would be something that had changed. Blood. There were small blood footprints leading away from the birch. They were wide spaced so he knew she was running. He knew he needed to cover up her steps but there wasn’t time. There would be later. He just needed to get to her and bring her back and tell her. Tell her everything.

            He followed her. He strode, he didn’t run because he didn’t want to draw attention from Fenrir. He assumed that Fenrir hadn’t seen her go or he wouldn’t have run in the opposite direction.

            He followed for a long time, the paths he was walking hadn’t been trodden on for years. He’d not been able to bring himself to come down here since that night. The images still haunted his thoughts when the forest slept and he remained awake. The limbs being torn away. The blood. More blood than he’d ever seen. He shook the thought out of his head. The sun was dropping now. The forest wasn’t been kind tonight. It was taking him hours to make a journey that seemed to have only taken Zora a few minutes to make. 

            Darkness fell over the land and Ghille’s eyes adjusted to suit. His hearing prickled at the sound of every insect’s movement. He heard something. It was quiet at first but as it picked up speed it became louder. It wasn’t elegant like Fenrir, this was clumsy movement, it was defiantly a night creature, but which he couldn’t tell. He followed the sound until he saw the thing approaching a shadowed figure. He analysed the creature’s aura first. It was empty. The pupils in his hazelnut eyes strained and seemed to zoom in on it. It was humanoid in shape and size, but its body was just grey, blotchy flesh that was rotting away. It had two rows of teeth in behind its dark grey lips, which were pierced with a metal ring. Its  eyes were empty. He knew instantly what beast this was.

“Get his head Zora! It’s a Strzyga!” He heard a voice say but it wasn’t his. It was the one that resided in his mind.

It appeared that she’d heard it none the less as she lifted the rusty axe she’d somehow acquired up to swing. But the Strzyga pushed her over and held her down. Ghille Dub ran forwards to provide assistance but as he approached the struggle ended. The Strzyga was howling in pain. He went to lift it off her but he couldn’t remove it. Zora’s hand had penetrated his stomach and had broken through the other side. Her eyes were blank and wide, just as they were when she slept, but she wasn’t asleep. She pushed the creature to the ground and held him down. She ripped out the intestines and left them on the floor

“Zora! Zora what are you doing!? Stop this stop it now!” He pleaded.

She took the axe and began stripping the flesh from it’s chest using the only sharp bit of it. Then she cracked the ribs and broke, then removed the Sternal plate. She pulled up the ribcage vertically to expose the heart and lungs. She placed her hands on the heart. Ghille tried to grab her and stop her from doing this but he couldn’t move the iron grip she had on the creature, which was still howling. She placed her hands around the heart and pulled sharply separating it from the circulatory system. At least the poor creature couldn’t feel anymore of her torture now. Both its hearts and souls could move on.

            She placed the heart in her mouth and began devouring it. Mouthful after mouthful. Ghille Dubh felt sick. She had know how to perform his surgery so well. She had hardly flinched when she’d done it to him. Now he knew why. He knew she had done some horrific things; he just prided himself in not knowing what they were.

            She swung the axe and removed the Strzyga’s head and walked a little while with it. Then she fell to the ground shaking as if having some sort of fit. Slowly she came out of it and stared up at Ghille in all her bloodstained horror. Ghille felt himself change season.

“What the fuck just happened?” She said weakly whilst muscles twitched all over her body.

Ghille said nothing. He moved away from her and sat with his head on his knees. He felt like screaming. Running away. Leaving her to it. Letting Fenrir get her back. This was too fucking hard.

 “What the FUCK just happened?!” She screamed.

            Anger rose in Ghille quickly he stood up and pulled up. He grabbed the back of her neck and threw her down onto her knees and forced her to look at the floor to reveal the severed head.

“THIS is what you’ve done. These woods are sacred. And look what you’ve done”

For the first time in a very long time he was loosing his temper with her. The tree spirits felt the same anger. .

“If I’d have not done anything he would have killed me! What was I supposed to do?!”

“So this was too then.”

Ghille led her to the creature’s body. It was badly mutilated. There was blood everywhere. It was a mess. A huge bloody mess and the blood still pulsed out of the being.

“You removed his ribcage while he was still alive. Then I watched you eat the heart.”

            Zora ran away from the body and over to a hollow tree. She hung onto it as red sick came out of her mouth and splashed onto the floor splashing on her feet and dress. Ghille Dubh provided no comfort for her.

 

He couldn’t look at her. She repulsed him. No matter how much he had wanted her to be something. She was still a Jaud. He watched her bury the Strzyga. The body  where they were is head deeper in the forest. A Strzyga was once human. Born with two hearts, two souls and two sets of teeth. When the human side died whether that’s naturally or not, one heart and soul remained. Now the other heart and soul had disappeared the corpse could be used by other night creatures and come back as something far darker. He wouldn’t help her. He couldn’t. He rested his head in his hands and remained silent. Hours lapsed on and he watched her from the corner of his eye. She laid down on the forest floor and fell into a deep sleep quickly.

Ghille Dubh knelt down next to her and studied her. The blood was affecting her appearance already. The red tones in her hair were becoming much more dull and didn’t resemble the sunset anymore. The crimson lips that had so beautifully contrasted with her fabulously silver skin were sore and faded. Where her lips were slightly parted he could see her pearly teeth weren’t sensually pointed now, slowly they were sharpening and becoming carnivorous. He knew what was going to happen. The battle was already lost. He pressed his head against hers and whispered into her ear. A tear rolled down his short nose and dripped onto her cheek. He needed to get away from her. He stood, took the axe and silently left her disappearing into the dreary, deadly forest and didn’t turn back.

He disliked this hope that had somehow been burning in him. He knew she would find the cottage on her own that wasn’t about hope. He didn’t want to know what she did with the knowledge she gained. He didn’t want to be near her. She was the opposite of everything he stood for. But he needed to see her. Make sure she was okay. Make sure she didn’t get hurt.

You shouldn’t care.

“Yes I know that. I just…”

Just what? Want her to be the one. She’s not.

“I…” Ghille realised he was just talking to himself. He was embarrassed and started to make his way back to his empty home.

Empty. Just like you.

He stopped in his tracks. He couldn’t make his mind up. He’d never had to make a choice like this before. Choices had always been so monochrome. It was all so simple before, the choices were already made for him. He was a follower not a leader. This made his chest hurt. He didn’t know how to make decisions that mattered. When he’d saved Vesna it hadn’t been a hard choice. It hadn’t mattered whether she lived or died. He chose to save her because that’s what made him feel good. If he’d heave let her die, there would have been no consequence. Leave Zora, his entire life could be different. If she was the one Likho had foretold, the entire forest would suffer, all for his mistake.

            It took hours but he made his choice and decided to only interfere if there was danger. He made his way down to the cottage, sat above it in one of his old favourite trees. He used to wait to play with her and her brother here. He’d bring their mother flowers for their house and help hang the washing out. He’d waited in this tree day after day as they grew from tots to teenagers. Here he was again, waiting for her. She must find this place soon; she’d been away for a long time.

            There was silence in the forest. He stared at the now dead cottage. The once kept ivy parasitically climbed and hugged the cottage growing in through the windows and across the doorway. The once fragrant honeysuckle was withered. The well that Tunda had captured Ajax in had collapsed in on itself leaving just a gaping deep hole in the ground. It was dead.

            Ghille Dubh was startled to see what appeared to be himself approaching the cottage. Except it wasn’t him. His skin was the wrong season. The replica was in summer whereas he was most defiantly autumn venturing into spring. It had to be Odmience, a changeling. He wasn’t just a changeling he was the only one that had ever made it to adulthood; usually they were killed as babies when parents realised their own child had been taken.

            Odmience clambered through the iron barred window and moments later reappeared holding a small girl. No it was a wizened woman, who was captured in an adolescent body. His Zora.

No. Just Zora.

            He followed. Odmience wasn’t from the dark army. He was meant to be neutral. He was used by the darkness to create havoc but the creature itself wasn’t evil. He followed inquisitively. It didn’t take long for them to approach the mountain. When they reached Fenrir’s pack’s cave he saw Jaud being propelled from Odmience’s arms and he mutated from Ghille Dubh into his true form. His face was a blank canvas. All his body and face was yellowish white with slight bumps all over it like primer. It had two holes for a nose, slits for eyes and a dark, empty, circle mouth.

            Fenrir, and his sons Hati and Skoll, approached her.

“So, dearest, you’ve returned again.” Fenrir’s voice was dripping with sarcasm.

“Get the fuck away from me.”

Such passion.

“Now, now…who else have you got? Your precious tree elf has left you. There’s just me now. Just like it used to be.” He tilted her chin up with his snout.

Get the fuck off her.

 “Do you remember how happy we used to be together?”

Jaud wretched from her nose and spat thick mucus in his eye. Ghille’s face cracked into a grin momentarily. He had forgotten it was serious.

“Get. The. Fuck. Away. From. Me” She repeated aggressively.

Fenrir lifted his paws and struck her across the chest.

Bastard!

“How dare you, don’t you remember what I did for you? Don’t you remember what we had? Feasting on the blood of those inferior to us? Insolence.”

The cave began to fill with Wargs and wolves snarling in unison with their king.

“Why did you betray me? I offered you the world! I would have made you my bride. But you choose that thing. That mere servant of the forests. A servant over a king. What an idiotic concept, ” Fenrir snarled.

Rather a servant than a monster.

            The he saw her go back into a her trancelike stages. She was remembering. Which parts he didn’t know, but he began running in from the side this was not the best of times. But as quickly as it started it had stopped and he backed down.

            “You’re just a Jaud. I could have any other of your kind if I wanted.” Fenrir snarled.

“My name is Zora.” She whispered softly.

“Not this nonsense again. Your name is Jaud. You are one. You will never be anything else.”

“My name is Zora.” She spoke louder and clearer now.

Fenrir lifted his slab-like paw to strike her down again but this time it appeared like she was ready for it. Zora ducked and the wildness built up inside her. She was transforming. The blue rings in her eyes glowed so bright that they turned white. Her pupils disappeared as her eyes glazed over. Her head lolled backwards and she began to rise slightly from the floor and she floated forwards a little way feet dragging on the floor, grazed and bleeding from the rock.

            The transformation was as much agony as it had been the first time for her. The lumps appeared and then the points erupted through her skin and the fresh linen. The muscular wings tore through her back and an membrane opened like bats wings covered in blood. The wings pounded at the air but she didn’t float any higher.

            He hadn’t felt himself move to the side of her but he was there he couldn’t let this happen again!

“Zora, stop! It doesn’t have to be this way, this time. We will find another way.” He screamed but the gathering winds whipped his voice back into the forest.

A hideous echoing voice replied, “This is what I am. This is the only way.”

“We can find another way please don’t do this to us!”

Ghille reached out his long fingers and clenched one of her tiny fists in it.

“You’ll forget again Zora. I can’t do this!”

He closed his eyes and ripped his arms away from her. The Wargs were moving in for attack and he was ready. He threw them all away from her as the pounded but he knew ultimately this was Zora’s task. She tilted back her head and let out an ear-piercing screech that filled the air and made the mountains quake the birds in the trees flee their homes. Rocks tumbled down from the mountain and stalactites began the crack on the cave roof. They appeared much sharper than they had been before. They fell. Each of the sharpened rocks fell through a head, or a chest of a demonic wolf. Blood filled the cave as their wounds seeped out. A horrific whimpering filled the air. They continued falling even after the Wargs were all laying silently on the ground but she wasn’t shaking it anymore. The whole mountain was vibrating. Zora pulled Ghille Dubh towards her and embraced him. She pressed her lips against him as her sticky blood drenched wings held encased him from danger. The stones kept falling and piling on top of them. Then the darkness came.

 

Ghille Dubh clawed his way to the surface dragging. He hadn’t dared move any rocks for quite a while in fear of causing another avalanche. He dragged Zora under her armpits to the top as he slowly escaped the stone prison they had slept in overnight. It felt strange to him that his clothes weren’t even dirtied by the catastrophe. He knew the same couldn’t be said for Zora.

            Her silver skin was turning that awful corpse colour. Her wide unflickering eyes stared. All that remained of her glorious bat wings were small black stumps that looked burnt at the end. They were slowly immersing back into her spine. Her wrist spikes had retracted leaving thick gashes that were evenly spaced. Ghille Dubh picked her up and gripped her legs with his long fingers as he took her into the forest.

            He ventured in some distance before he laid her on the soft, soiled floor. He sat with her head resting on his knees his back and neck arched over her. Her breathing was shallow and his heart in her chest seemed to be dim.

“Zora, wake up. Zora, he got away again.” He whispered.

Zora managed to turn her head a little and cleared her throat to speak.

“I know.” She said with a sympathetic smile.

“I can’t do this again Zora. I can’t loose you.”

“Ghille I’ve never asked you to do this.”

“Why do you have to pick the hardest way?”

“Would you love me if I was anything but what I am?”

“You’ll forget.”

“A heart that truly loves never forgets. You need to leave Ghille.” She heard Bozaloshtsh’s screech but was unafraid of the death that it would bring. “Next full moon. I promise.”

Liar.

Zora’s large unmoving eyes slowly closed and a tear trickled down from beneath them. Her breathing slowly stopped. Ghille placed his hand on her chest and whispered:

“I gave you my heart to make you whole, to fill the gap where humanity was stolen from you. It lies in your chest below your glorious breasts. It is yours forever.”

He cut into his wrist with his athamé and his blood seeped out from the wound. He pressed his wrist into her mouth and the blood trickled into her throat. He kissed her pale forehead lightly. He held her head to his own.

“Goodbye my Jaud, my sweet Zora. I will always be your dark servant.”

 

Ghille Dubh did wait for the next full moon for her. And the next. And the one after. He attempted to help her remember again but the same catastrophe happened every time. She was unable to control her transformations. Time and time again, she forgot him. He liked to pretend that he could deal with it. Every time he tried a different attempt. One time he was all smiles and told her from the go but it was too much and immediately she felt threatened and ran. He had come across her corpse days later. Cut open from her transformation with grey fur sticking to the wounds. He had given her blood and left her to reawaken. It seemed no matter what tactic he chose for her, it still wouldn’t work.  He felt like he was worn thin, like butter over too much bread.

            He wanted things to work, he wanted things to be easy again but most of all, he wanted to run away. He wanted to run away and not come back. He’d devoted hundreds of years to this ridiculous scheme. A scheme that had no effect. At one point he’d assumed things were getting better when humans began to populate the forest again but fact was they had no other choice. Yes they had retreated back to form villages similar to Leszek but that was only because of the trauma that Zora had caused. Things had only got worse since the day her family had died. It was as if all the pain she felt from that day had been inflicted on anyone who entered her forest. Things hadn’t got better for the forest. Things were just momentarily better for him. That empty void that he had always felt had been filled for what, when looking at the span of his existence, was an extremely short period of time.

            The revelation of how many times he’d tried and been thwart by Fenrir, or other factors came to him when he held Zora in his arms her body dying yet again. She had promised next time it would work again. Finally, Ghille had understood. This couldn’t stop. If he carried on as he was. He’d watch her awaken, then she’d remember and be afraid then she would attempt to confront Fenrir. The confrontation would lead to a transformation, the transformation led to her death and her death to her resurrection.

            As he held her in his arms, as she slipped slowly to death. He pressed his head against hers as he always did. He cut into his wrist and bled into her mouth. He kissed her forehead lightly. He made sure she was comfortable. Then he left. The difference was this time he knew he wasn’t coming back.

It’s for the best.

“I’m sorry Zora.”

He wanted to weep. But his eyes were dry. His chest ached from trying to. He understood how Vesna must have felt before she gained her eyes. Trying to cry without tears was tired. But he couldn’t cry anymore. Vesna’s screams were echoing through the forest. Within moments she glided next to him. Those magical blue eyes pierced into his.

“You’re leaving.”

It sounded as if it should have been a question but it wasn’t.

“What about your promise?” She said in her cold voice. “I can’t die without your help.”

“You have to understand…”

“No. No I don’t Ghille Dubh.”

“What would you do for Ajax?”

“Anything.” She replied defiantly.

Ghille doubted this love that Vesna thought she felt. He knew she had been very lonely but he also knew she was naïve. He almost shook his head at himself. He was naïve too. He had no experience other than Zora. At least Vesna’s choice was a little more suitable than his own. She chose human. Weak? Yes. Cruelly? Yes. But so delicately perfect.

“If his life depended on you never seeing him again, would you leave?”

Vesna dipped her head for a while and nodded. Her eyes sparkled with tears. She would never see Ajax again.

“I will remain a few more days. Then I will be gone. Don’t try and find me.” He patted her shoulder and disappeared into the forest.

            He made his way, ignoring the winding forest paths, through to the grey-sanded beach. The salty air hit him at once. The rushing sound of the crashing waves filled his ears. His bare feet stepped slowly onto the sand and he sat down. He stared into the sea. The vast emptiness extended into the horizon. Gulls and other sea birds cawed in the air. The emptiness felt comforting. It was an accurate physical place that represented his empty loneliness.

            The next few days he resorted to making a boat for himself. It was a simple craft, made from a grey Sea Hibiscus tree’s that grew close to the edge. It didn’t take him to weave his magic and create the seaworthy vessel. He lined the bottom with his itchy blanket and loaded it with several empty books, a quill and a few vials of ink. He was set.

How long will this take?

The voice didn’t sound mocking.

“As long as it takes,” Ghille breathed back to it.

            He boarded his boat and pushed it out into the sea. He had to paddle it out for quite a while before the tide stopped pushing him back. The rain began to pour and thunderclouds appeared above him. The island didn’t want him to leave. He paddled furiously to get away from the grip. He didn’t care about that place anymore and eventually the seas grasp on the boat loosened and allowed him to be free. Soon the foul island that he had once resided on seemed just a thin green line on the far horizon. Ghille Dubh had always been fond of naming things and people appropriately. It had only just occurred to him that he had never named his homeland. He thought carefully about the connotations of the place.

Bitterly he said, “I think Charna is suitable. Dark Island.”

He lay back in his boat and listened to the sound of near silence. His eyes closed and he felt the days pass him by. He didn’t sleep. Instead he spoke with the voice. They contemplated together whether his decision had been the best course to take. The further out to see he travelled the more he began to realise the relaxing trip he’d imagined was not going to exist. His dreams were filled with thoughts of Zora. The voice of Likho echoed in his head:

“You will want to leave to go across the Grey Sea searching for answers that you will not fathom. But in your time of desperation you must not leave this sacred place.” Her croaky voice had said.

            He had essentially killed Ajax at her command. He’d put Vesna through all that pain just to use her for the cause and now, he had killed the forest himself. What surprised him more than anything was how little he cared. The further he drifted from that forsaken island, the less he cared what the people there had in store.

            Years passed him by and still he floated in the little grey boat uttering conversations to his voice, until a real sleep fell over him. This sleep was like an extended version of what he’d experienced as a child. They weren’t assisted by Likho’s magic. They were just his own selfish attempt at trying to die. It was just a sleep. Darkness filled his mind as he slept through the centuries.

            When he awoke he found himself alone. There was complete silence. The voice had left him. After all those long years the voice was finally gone. Ghille knew he should be thankful but he wasn’t, he just felt bitterly alone. He wished to go back into that blissful sleep again but he knew it wouldn’t come. He listened to the sound of the world. Things had changed while he’d been asleep. He didn’t know which way he needed to paddle. To one side he saw heat, and sand in the distance. The people on the shore were just black dots. He could see very few trees. The opposite direction was just vast, empty, ocean. He picked that direction and began his long odyssey.

“I told you I’d take as long as I needed.” He said out loud hoping for a reply from the voice but his mind remained silent.

A thought occurred to him. This was actually the first time he’d been truly alone. Before he had felt lonely but others had been there. The tree’s had spoken to him. His father had looked down on him but here, he didn’t feel lonely, he felt alone; to him there was a huge difference.

 

He was unsure where he was; the seas were icy and calm in every direction. He had been travelling through these icy barren lands for weeks and his fingers were frozen to the oars he paddled with. Huge mermaid-like creatures lounged on the sheets of surface ice. He was a long way from his destination. He continued paddling although his he was completely chilled to the bone.

            Under his ship loomed a giant shadow. It was huge, the size of Leszek!  Then without warning the huge shape surfaced an ugly head. It had huge lips and two eyes that, although tiny in comparison to the rest of its body, were the size of Ghille’s head. The thing had sea cretins clinging onto its oily skin, it sat floating just above the water facing Ghille Dubh for a long time before, to his amazement, the spoke.

“Now, now little man, what are you brings you to my humble abode?”

The creature’s breath almost knocked Ghille over from both stench and strength.

“I’m just passing though big fella, just passing through.” He didn’t know what this creature’s alignment was. In fact, he didn’t know what this creature was.

“Now that I’m sure of but I do wonder, where are you passing through to?”

Ghille tongue began to roll out “Home” but he didn’t feel that it was home.

“To an island. I don’t know where it is. I left there a long time ago. I left someone very special there.”

The huge creature left out a low, vibrating laugh.

“And you think she’ll have waited for you?”

“She lost her memory. She won’t even know who I am.”

The creature seemed to be pulling a sympathetic face but it was hard to make out due to his odd complexion and the infestation of sea muscles that covered him.

“You’re not like the other human people that come out here. For one you’re green. Now I’ve seen black and white and red and yellow skinned people in these waters. But I have never seen green little man.”

“That’s because I’m not human big fella.”

“So little man who isn’t human. What is you’re name?”

“I am Ghille Dubh I am a son of Odin.”

“I am but a simple whale and I prefer to shorten my grand name Balaenoptera Musculus to a simpler Balaen.”

“May I pass now or do I have to stay here freezing, listening to you’re kind empty words?” Ghille was feeling angry now. He wasn’t sure why. For weeks he had longed for companionship but now he was just bored of listening to this prattle.

“Why yes, of course the problem is, why do you want to pass when you don’t know what direction your little island is?!”

That was very true.

“Well what would you suggest?” He felt bitter

“You shall abandon you’re weary ship and join me. I have nothing to do while I stay here except wait to be hunted and have my bones turned into underwear.”

            Ghille had already jumped from his boat before the sentence had finished.

“One small question Ghille Dubh, son of Odin, can you breath water?”

He thought momentarily. He had never considered this prospect before. He replied with a mere shrug, as it appeared Balaen was just about to dive beneath to water. Ghille grabbed onto the small fin that protruded part way down the whales back. He felt the rushing water run through his black hair and freeze even more his cold face. The water bit at him but soon he became used to the feeling and became comfortable. He found he didn’t need to breath the water. He also found he didn’t need to breath air either. His lungs were just another useless organ he possessed.

            The two travelled together for a long time. Island to island looking for the one where his sweet Zora would be. They shared stories of their lives with each other. Balaen, it appeared, was quite soft hearted as he often wept as Ghille told him of Zora. Finally after months of searching they came across a familiar island, although it wasn’t quite what he’d expected.

“Charna,” he whispered uncertainly.

            It the beach resembled the one he had left. But there were shiny white chair-beds spread across the empty beach. There were no trees. This couldn’t be where he wanted to be. He stepped off the whale and stood on the beach. He felt a kind of pressure rush into his system. As magic filled his veins. This was the right place.

“Well Ghille Dubh. This is where we part I suppose,” Balaen sighed.

“I suppose it is,” Ghille spoke bowing his head to him.

“You should write what we spoke of. Give it to the girl. If that bring her to tears and help her understand. I don’t know what will. Goodbye Ghille Dubh. I am certain we will meet again.”

With that he plunged into the waves and his dark water shadow disappeared.

            Ghille was shaking. Huge shapes towered above him. They were like the cottage Zora’s family had died in but bigger, hundreds of times bigger. He walked off the beach and moved onto the stone pathway that wasn’t made out of any stone he’d seen before. Above him poles with lights that weren’t made from candles lit up the path. He ventured into the dark, colossal village nervous at what he would find. Along the streets there were huge lights that spelled out words he didn’t understand but could smell what they meant. The reek of ales and wines erupted from them as people wearing the strangest clothes he’d ever seen entered and left. No one even glanced at him as he walked passed. A hand fell on his shoulder he turned to see a barely changed Vesna. Her eyes wide her face spread into a grin that he didn’t think he’d ever seen before.

“You’ve returned. You’re here to resolve your promise.”

Ghille thought and then nodded.

“What is this place and where is Zora?” He asked bewildered.

“The humans call it a city. It replaced the forest as the villages expanded. You have been away a very long time Ghille Dubh.”

He dreaded to think how long.

“Where is Zora?”

“She has left and returned on numerous instances through the centuries by boat and then by the metal bird they call a plane. She comes back and changes her name and pretends to be someone new every time.”

“Where is she now?”

“She is here somewhere I’m sure. You should go to her. Her dreams are filled with images of you but she doesn’t know whom you are. She draws and paints you know. Hundreds of images of you. All over her home.”

“She wasn’t the one was she? She didn’t turn the evil to good. Look at this place. I killed the forest. I failed”

“Why did you fail? You did not fail to find the one. And the forest still thrives just this part has died. The only thing you failed to do is you failed to see that you couldn’t rid the world of evil. Where there is good like you, there will be the opposite evil. She wasn’t meant to tip the balance to your side. She was meant to equalise the balance. She lives in the evil; she resides in an evil city. But she protects the good in it. Come, let me show you something.”

Vesna led him someway through the bewildering streets. The odd looking plants kept in small boxes. Huge looming buildings with their dark alleyways. They walked until they reached a fence. Behind the fence a wild forest thrived. Just within the fence was an unnaturally large looking birch tree. His home still existed.

“They tried to cut the trees down. She stopped them. She bought all the land past this point. That’s exactly half the island. All including your home, your mothers grave and as much as the forest as she could.”

Ghille nodded. He felt that he was beginning to understand.

“Won’t you go to her?”

Ghille remained silent for a few moments.

“Vesna. Your duty as the Bozaloshtsh has been fulfilled. Come. I will help you with what you requested.”

They walked in silence to the birch together knowing at what would come soon.

            Inside the birch was exactly how he’d left it except everything was now covered in a sheet of grime. Vesna sat on his bed quietly. She was quiet. Was she having second thoughts about this?

“No I’m not.” She said loudly.

He’d forgotten about her abilities. He rattled around in one of his many chests until he found a small bottle of dark purple liquid. He handed it to her. She drank it down in an instance. The drowsiness came at once. She lay back onto the bed. Then the cold sweats.

“Ghille, you promise he’s waiting for me there?”

Ghille wasn’t certain he was waiting for her. But he was certain he was there so he nodded as he pulled one of his many blankets over her. Slowly she slipped in and out of the reality and then her eyes closed and her breathing stopped. Vesna was dead. He carried her body out into the forest to the place he’d buried his mother and they’re buried Ajax together and next to them he made another grave and placed her in it. He piled the dirt on top of her.

“Thank you Vesna for your service. I’m sorry I had to use you.”

For the first time in his life, he felt guilt. He had taken advantage of a grieving woman in order to satisfy his own quest.

            He made his way back to the birch and sat alone in this familiar room. He felt comforted. He’d never expected that he’d be glad to be home. He had no idea why he’d bothered to come back before but now he knew. This was his home. No matter what sorrows it had brought him. He remembered what Balaen had said to him about writing how he felt but where to start? His mothers voice spoke to him.

“Begin at the beginning”

He opened a new leather bound book and began.

            He saw her not long after he began to write. She was sat on that sad little fence staring into the forest. Her beautiful blue ringed eyes searching for answers. He had watched her with his chest hurting. He wanted to go to her and take her into his arms and hold her tight and just kiss her. But she would be afraid of him. He noticed the scars were faded massively. It appeared that no transformation had happened for years. Had old Fenrir finally got the picture that she didn’t want him? Or had he just died? Ghille didn’t know and didn’t care. He was happy that she had learnt to control her transformations. Finally as the full moon broke through the clouds she stood and left. Ghille followed her staying far enough behind for her not to sense him. He watched her enter a door at the bottom of a building that seemed to stand out from the rest. It was made of stone rather than redbrick and for such a large house it was strangely empty. He climbed up to a balcony and watched her, staying hidden. She took off her jeans and leather boots and pulled off her tight t-shirt revealing pretty white knickers that were only just paler than her grey skin. She pulled on a white nightdress that fastened right up to her neck and slipped into her bed. She turned the lights off and began to drift to sleep. Ghille carried on staring at her. Smiling. Her room was full of odds and ends. It reminded him of his house except things were much tidier. Paintings of him were everywhere all in the styles of different eras. There were books with notes and flowers and plants all over her room. It was fantastic. He had found her. She wasn’t just a Jaud anymore. She had developed into the Zora he’d seen glimpses of in the time they’d spent together.

            He walked back to the birch with the first real smile he’d had in centuries. For the first time he felt happy although it was mixed with a strange feeling of inadequacy. He had tried so hard to help her but she hadn’t needed him. He had this overpowering feeling that if they were to be together then things would just go back to how they were. He didn’t know what to do except to continue with Balaen’s advice. He would write it to her.

            It took him months to get it all down. He added pressed flowers and other things into certain pages to make it appeal to her artistic abilities. In it he wrote a note aside from the story

“I will always protect you and wait for you. One day we will be together. You’ll know when.”

He wrapped the book in a length of woven grass and when the night came he hurried to her house. He left it by the door. Knocked three times and fled to her balcony to watch the proceedings. The bright red hair soon appeared below him and picked up the heavy book. She looked around confused then retreated back into the house. She sat cross-legged on her bed and turned to page one. She read all the way through it then burst into tears hugging the book. Ghille didn’t know whether he knew when the time would be right but he knew it wasn’t now. It might not be for another century. But he would wait for her. He would wait forever if it took that long.

            She turned back to page one and began reading again. In Ghille Dubh’s messy handwriting on old yellowing paper a story was written on a page full of inkblots. It appeared he really had started from the very beginning. It read:

 

 

 

He was born just like any man, hundreds of years before the village of Leszek was founded, when people lived in the forest rather than in fear of it…