rainbow

28 days: 6 hours: 42 minutes: 12 seconds. And a bit.

The Golden Moose

Once upon a land in a time far away.

Lived a poor family who homed in dismay

Sons had the horny father and Mother

Each son had 2 brothers

The youngest was Jack

Known as Dummy for being slack

The older two were Elton and Dave

The sounds of which made their father rave

 

One day they ran out of wood

The oldest was asked to fetch some and he said he would.

So Elton went out his pink axe in hand

With his pink frosted cake and wine he did look grand.

Ventured into the forest ready to cut

Full of pride he knew how to strut

He went to swing his axe at the tree

When an old man interrupted “Excuse me”

 

“May I have a little of your cake”

He asked the foul snake

“If I give you some I wont have any for my fat face

Now bugger off, you’re a disgrace”

The man left but he had a plan

Just before the wood cutting began

Elton noticed a round hole in the plant

Without thinking twice he whipped down his pants

 

Something within began to suck and blow

Just like one a proper hoe.

Then with one quick thud.

Elton was no longer a stud.

His penis dropped inside the tree to the ground.

And his weapon would never again be found.

He ran home to be sew up by mummy

All but he found it funny.

 

Next they sent Dave

Who was ready to face anything, he was so brave.

Sent with steak and beer

He felt he had nothing to fear.

But before he began the work

He began to Jerk

And drunk the beer before the man could ask

So his penis too was axed

 

Finally Dummy was sent to cut down an Oak

But all that was left for him was Rola Cola Coke

And his mothers left over Shepard’s pie

Which was disgusting the first time!

He wondered into the forest axe dragging on the floor

“Excuse me young man I can’t help but notice your

Pie and coke in your bag. May I have a little?”

“You can have it all! But it won’t entice your spittle!”

 

Dummy handed it over and the old paedophile did feast

For an hour and a half at least.

“Don’t I get a reward or something? That’s how fairy tales go!”

“Yes yes, cut down that tree and you’re prize will be below”

He hacked away and was shocked to see

Cramped inside the tiny hollow tree

A golden moose was standing on its tippy toes,

With two tiny penis’ beginning to decompose.

 

With the golden elk lead by its horns

He ignored the young children that did scorn

And went down the local whorehouse

It wasn’t long before he was undoing a girl’s blouse

The Elk remained in the stable while Dummy had his fun

Vaginal, oral, sixty-nine and up the bum

A whore snuck in, in the night.

And when she saw the golden moose she squealed in delight

 

She went to pull out one of its buttocks hairs

And found her fingers stuck up there

A girl came out to help

When she too became stuck she began to yelp

 The next morning when Dummy came out

The angry girls began to scream and shout.

He led the elk into the town

And as more people “helped” he had more following him around

 

He took his elk and conga of people to the nearest king’s house

Where a king lived with a daughter and his latest spouse

The princess had never cried

Not since her mother died

But when she saw the line of whores

She positively roared

For her mother had died in a conga line

When the girl was only nine

 

The king spoke that they should be wed

But only if he passed three trials instead

The trials were impossible for someone so thick

Or for one who couldn’t keep his mind off his dick

Like licking ones elbow

Refraining from eating yellow snow

And finally he was told to find a boat

That sailed on land and on water did float

 

Soon the trials were complete

Through what seemed a tremendous feat.

He won the princesses heart

Then persuaded her to dress like a tart

With a little magic help from his paedophile friend

He made the young girl to her knees descend.

To satisfy his every need.

Yes, life for Dummy was good indeed.